Im at home... my home in nc anywayzzz.
its so weird being back...
Dont get me wrong. I loved being greeted by my parents and rebecca at the airport.. I loved having the normal sunday lunch with my dad's side of the family. Food has been wonderful.. I got to brush my teeth without using a water bottle... I am so thankful for these things.. more now than before por supuesto...
I watched the end of the world cup.. but it wasnt the same.. it was in english and there was no commercial for Coke with the theme song.." en las callas muchos manos.... que viene que vay" i loved hearing that... I havent sweated at all today.. in fact I have a long sleeve shirt on and my feet are about to freeeze..
but at the same time I dont feel all here yet.. I think I not only forgot my bathing suit in Guatemala.. but part of myself as well.. maybe even part of my heart.
I loved it. I love the relaxed, easy-going culture.. I loved my family... all of them including my infinite number of cousins.. I loved speaking Spanish. I loved meeting new people. I loved drinking coke from a bag. I loved tortillas at every meal. I loved the mountains. I loved the americans I went done there with. I loved the lil adventures I had with friends. I loved learning words only used in guatemala like puchica. I love cucos, granizadas, and por supuesto churrazcos... I loved the people.. at the nursing home, my students, the people at the store I worked at, the people of Llano Verde, the people of Llano Largo, the people at the bakery, and last but not least... my family.. haha... especially my sister.
I've already started praying about returing :D
Thank you all for your prayers and support! I look forward to sharing stories, pictures, and my heart for Guatemala.
Va pues
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
3rd week of the second month.. and like the 3rd week of the first month.. sickness has struck again.. but like the first month.. it wasnt bad and im fine now!
my job for the past few days since there my school is on vacation has been working in a tienda in the mornings and bakery in the afternoons. i love my students... but i love working at these places also and kinda wanna finish out my month here..
the store has all your snack, beverage, and cooking needs.... for Guatemala.. it looks like a hole in the wall.. but its really a room of a house.. the same house of the women that taught me and my friend to make tortillas.
not only is it a store but its also a a lil grill.. it kinda reminds me of my grandmas old store..
around 9 30 or 10... tons of workers flock to tienda Jessica to watch some TV through and to get a snack... tostadas, empanadas.. arroz con leche.. ive been helping.. trying to help through this rush.. i can at least pop the top to the glass bottle sodas... people ask for an agua... but it doesnt always mean water.. its kinda like how some people in nc say they want a coke.. but really want a sprite.. very confusing at first for those of us trying to learn the language... its alot of fun and i enjoy talking to all the people.. the world cup has obviously been a big deal and its been fun to watch every day.. i probably have watched 2 games a day...
at about 12 Jessica gives me some food.. which is always aammmmmazzzing.. maybe not the healthiest.. but its gooood. then i eat with her and my friend Susie.. the lady who taught us how to make tortillas.. its great.
ive gotten the opportunity to talk to susie alot and for that i am thankful to God for opening the door.
she attends the catholic church and she has alot of religious pictures hanging up. we were just talking and somehow we got to talking about one of her pics... then i popped the question.. wuts the difference between your church here and the evangelical church across the street...
she told me one was catholic one was evangelic.... so i asked again and for more info.. im obviously not God and I dont decide who gets to go to heaven or not... but I was so realived and happy after the conversation we had..
at here catholic church, just like the evangelic... they pray to God... padre.. God the father.. just like we do.. she believes in the trinity.. Jesus, Son of God who died for all sin...
I was already happy that she didnt pray to the saints or mary.. so then i asked her about the good works thing.. from my knowledge catholics believe they must do alot of good works to go to heaven.. i asked about this...
she said that christians should do good stuff.. and i then said but thats not what gets you to heaven right.. you have to pray and accept christ before you start doing good things for him and because of him.. she said she agreed... good works are easy when christ lives in your heart...
this was in spanish.. so many i didnt understand everything correctly.... and im not God so i dont get to decide who gets to go to heaven... but still... this conversation made me really happy and im excited have more talks with Susie.. im glad that we have become so close...
neways... i eat lunch with these peeps.. and i think the lunch yesterday just didnt agree even though i loved it... but its all good now.. im going to return in the morning to the tienda and then the bakery in the afternoon with susie and the other ladies...
pray for these relationships i have with these people.... its going to be hard to say goodbye.. but i know that some of these people i will see again in heaven..
pray for my family as well... they are all good people but there is def some tensions between households.. which is really sad when our church consists of family. esp my sister.. i love her to death.. but i want her to know its okay to love ppl when they dont love her back.. shes very judgemental and conservation.. not a good combination.. esp when it prohibits you from having relationships with people that differ in their beliefs, thinking, or even something as simple as clothing... i love her so much though.
i use to pray every morning before my mom and I would go to school for a little baby sister... God answered my pray.. not in the way i expected.. but it was answered.. for one month i have a little sister who i know loves me.. i just want this hard barrier of hers to be broken so more and more people can know how wonderful she is and how wonderful her God is... I want God to be real in her life.. not just a routine.... church every nite minus monday... skirts only... thats not christianity... i want her to fall in love with the relationship that she has.....
she took care of my last nite... after i upchucked my food from tienda jessica.... the toilet would not flush.. no water.. and i was locked in the house.. so i woke her up to get the key so i could go to the pilla to get a bucket of water to flush my vommit... it was quite the experience... she wasnt at all mad.. she insisted that if i needed something else to not hesitate and let her know.. i hate im not there tonite.. to talk to her... but i just dont know if could have had beans and eggs for dinner quite yet..
my family loves me too... even with their bizarre ways i know they do.. this morning one my aunts rubbed my belly with lotion to make it feel better... quite the experience at 7 in the morning after throwing up all nite... and she then made me this all natural drink that by the grace of God i got out of drinking because the bus was there to pick me up.... the drink reminded me of something i threw up last nite.... but i know that disgusting bebida was all out of love....
rest now... back to the norm in the mornings! only 11 more days here i think... its bittersweet...
speaking of sweet.. i cant wait to have some sweet tea
my job for the past few days since there my school is on vacation has been working in a tienda in the mornings and bakery in the afternoons. i love my students... but i love working at these places also and kinda wanna finish out my month here..
the store has all your snack, beverage, and cooking needs.... for Guatemala.. it looks like a hole in the wall.. but its really a room of a house.. the same house of the women that taught me and my friend to make tortillas.
not only is it a store but its also a a lil grill.. it kinda reminds me of my grandmas old store..
around 9 30 or 10... tons of workers flock to tienda Jessica to watch some TV through and to get a snack... tostadas, empanadas.. arroz con leche.. ive been helping.. trying to help through this rush.. i can at least pop the top to the glass bottle sodas... people ask for an agua... but it doesnt always mean water.. its kinda like how some people in nc say they want a coke.. but really want a sprite.. very confusing at first for those of us trying to learn the language... its alot of fun and i enjoy talking to all the people.. the world cup has obviously been a big deal and its been fun to watch every day.. i probably have watched 2 games a day...
at about 12 Jessica gives me some food.. which is always aammmmmazzzing.. maybe not the healthiest.. but its gooood. then i eat with her and my friend Susie.. the lady who taught us how to make tortillas.. its great.
ive gotten the opportunity to talk to susie alot and for that i am thankful to God for opening the door.
she attends the catholic church and she has alot of religious pictures hanging up. we were just talking and somehow we got to talking about one of her pics... then i popped the question.. wuts the difference between your church here and the evangelical church across the street...
she told me one was catholic one was evangelic.... so i asked again and for more info.. im obviously not God and I dont decide who gets to go to heaven or not... but I was so realived and happy after the conversation we had..
at here catholic church, just like the evangelic... they pray to God... padre.. God the father.. just like we do.. she believes in the trinity.. Jesus, Son of God who died for all sin...
I was already happy that she didnt pray to the saints or mary.. so then i asked her about the good works thing.. from my knowledge catholics believe they must do alot of good works to go to heaven.. i asked about this...
she said that christians should do good stuff.. and i then said but thats not what gets you to heaven right.. you have to pray and accept christ before you start doing good things for him and because of him.. she said she agreed... good works are easy when christ lives in your heart...
this was in spanish.. so many i didnt understand everything correctly.... and im not God so i dont get to decide who gets to go to heaven... but still... this conversation made me really happy and im excited have more talks with Susie.. im glad that we have become so close...
neways... i eat lunch with these peeps.. and i think the lunch yesterday just didnt agree even though i loved it... but its all good now.. im going to return in the morning to the tienda and then the bakery in the afternoon with susie and the other ladies...
pray for these relationships i have with these people.... its going to be hard to say goodbye.. but i know that some of these people i will see again in heaven..
pray for my family as well... they are all good people but there is def some tensions between households.. which is really sad when our church consists of family. esp my sister.. i love her to death.. but i want her to know its okay to love ppl when they dont love her back.. shes very judgemental and conservation.. not a good combination.. esp when it prohibits you from having relationships with people that differ in their beliefs, thinking, or even something as simple as clothing... i love her so much though.
i use to pray every morning before my mom and I would go to school for a little baby sister... God answered my pray.. not in the way i expected.. but it was answered.. for one month i have a little sister who i know loves me.. i just want this hard barrier of hers to be broken so more and more people can know how wonderful she is and how wonderful her God is... I want God to be real in her life.. not just a routine.... church every nite minus monday... skirts only... thats not christianity... i want her to fall in love with the relationship that she has.....
she took care of my last nite... after i upchucked my food from tienda jessica.... the toilet would not flush.. no water.. and i was locked in the house.. so i woke her up to get the key so i could go to the pilla to get a bucket of water to flush my vommit... it was quite the experience... she wasnt at all mad.. she insisted that if i needed something else to not hesitate and let her know.. i hate im not there tonite.. to talk to her... but i just dont know if could have had beans and eggs for dinner quite yet..
my family loves me too... even with their bizarre ways i know they do.. this morning one my aunts rubbed my belly with lotion to make it feel better... quite the experience at 7 in the morning after throwing up all nite... and she then made me this all natural drink that by the grace of God i got out of drinking because the bus was there to pick me up.... the drink reminded me of something i threw up last nite.... but i know that disgusting bebida was all out of love....
rest now... back to the norm in the mornings! only 11 more days here i think... its bittersweet...
speaking of sweet.. i cant wait to have some sweet tea
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
one more thing...
more on my trabajo... school
Let me just take the time to describe it more since I have time right now... I am sometimes with Kindergarten and sometimes with 6th grade.. but I want to expound on the Kinder.... thats what that call it here
In order to be a Kindergarten teacher here you must be able to be a zookeeper, policeman, and club bouncer.... the reasons follow
1. zookeeper.. the kids act like animals alot of the time.. so many have tried to bite me, they growl, scratch.... esp the boys.. they can be ferocious.. its kinda cute seeing a lil 5 year old crotched down like a lion about to pounce on you because you are their prey.
2. policeman.. to keep the peace.. i cant tell you how many times i have pulled lil boys off of each other.. these kids here are tough.. tattle tells to dot exist here in guat.. they dont cry... they just fight, fall, jump, kick, and scream... when they fall... they just get up with more energy...
3. club bouncer... you have to keep the kids in the classroom.. you lock the door to give yourself more time to prevent a child from escaping...all at the same time guarding the windows because they are easy to jump out of...
ps.. you have to be all of these at one time...
but most importantly to be a kinder teacher here i think it is important that one know how to be their mom also...
im pretty sure 95 percent of this class lives in the orphanage here at the mission.. its easy to tell.. they may be ferocious at times.. but they can be just as sweet... its true that they jump on you like a feline, but they love like a teddy bear.. and i can tell they are missing the love of a mom or parent...
more on my church.. the only boy that attends is my brother.. thats right.. even the pastor.. my mom here actually.. is a woman..
at first i was like woooooaa this is going to be interesting.
i personally dont think the bible teaches women should lead churches as pastors...
but my question is what is this church suppose to do..
there is no male leadership...
should they just not have church...
though the doctrine may be different than what i believe.. i cant help but admire how this church, this group of 7 or 8 women, have decided to still come together as believers and worship God... they dont have a male leader... but thats not an excuse.. its just another obstacle here on earth... who am i to judge or condemn that..
starting tomorrow school is out for a week.. im going to work in a tienda and bakery!! pretty stoked about it...
more on my trabajo... school
Let me just take the time to describe it more since I have time right now... I am sometimes with Kindergarten and sometimes with 6th grade.. but I want to expound on the Kinder.... thats what that call it here
In order to be a Kindergarten teacher here you must be able to be a zookeeper, policeman, and club bouncer.... the reasons follow
1. zookeeper.. the kids act like animals alot of the time.. so many have tried to bite me, they growl, scratch.... esp the boys.. they can be ferocious.. its kinda cute seeing a lil 5 year old crotched down like a lion about to pounce on you because you are their prey.
2. policeman.. to keep the peace.. i cant tell you how many times i have pulled lil boys off of each other.. these kids here are tough.. tattle tells to dot exist here in guat.. they dont cry... they just fight, fall, jump, kick, and scream... when they fall... they just get up with more energy...
3. club bouncer... you have to keep the kids in the classroom.. you lock the door to give yourself more time to prevent a child from escaping...all at the same time guarding the windows because they are easy to jump out of...
ps.. you have to be all of these at one time...
but most importantly to be a kinder teacher here i think it is important that one know how to be their mom also...
im pretty sure 95 percent of this class lives in the orphanage here at the mission.. its easy to tell.. they may be ferocious at times.. but they can be just as sweet... its true that they jump on you like a feline, but they love like a teddy bear.. and i can tell they are missing the love of a mom or parent...
more on my church.. the only boy that attends is my brother.. thats right.. even the pastor.. my mom here actually.. is a woman..
at first i was like woooooaa this is going to be interesting.
i personally dont think the bible teaches women should lead churches as pastors...
but my question is what is this church suppose to do..
there is no male leadership...
should they just not have church...
though the doctrine may be different than what i believe.. i cant help but admire how this church, this group of 7 or 8 women, have decided to still come together as believers and worship God... they dont have a male leader... but thats not an excuse.. its just another obstacle here on earth... who am i to judge or condemn that..
starting tomorrow school is out for a week.. im going to work in a tienda and bakery!! pretty stoked about it...
Monday, June 21, 2010
Got to do this quick.. cuz technically... Im not suppose to be talking, writing, reading, or breathing English right now.. All of last week, including with other Americans only Spanish.. talk about making your head hurt. It was def harder than I thought it was going to be at first... but I wouldnt change it for the world.. I feel in love last week.
The family that I live with.... Mom, 18 year old sister, 16 year old brother.. when Im with the brother and sister.. Trav and Reb.. its like being with yall when we are hyper.. u know when we laugh at everything and the dumbest things are funny... well its like that all the time with my bro and sis.. its hilarious...
My job... I commute back to the mission I was at the first month to work at the school here... Liberty College.. in the morning Im with 6th grade... until Friday only the girls would talk to me, but apparently I became cool on Friday and the boys did... or maybe it was because I could help them with their Math hw.. either or.. ill take it...In the afternoon its high school.. school here is only half a day.. elem and middle school go in the morning... high school in the afternoon. in the afternoon i am with seniors... all my students have been wonderful, patient teachers of spanish. i love both the classes, but especially the students in the afternoon because we are pretty much the same age and we all just talk.. i love it.
living conditions... wonderful.. I live in Llano Largo.. at first me and my friend thought it was going to be lil country town with two houses.. mine and hers.. but its not.. the houses here are the nicest i have seen in guatemala.. one house has a a wide screen tv that is like twice the size of ours at home.. im sure my dad wouuld like it.. in another house a pool table.. neway.. this town is wealthy.. my family is probably the poorest.. but our house is still nice.. nicer than i thought.. i thought i would be using the bathroom in a hole in the ground and showers with buckets... but i have a toilet and shower... and sometimes water.. haha .. thats another story..
in short.. i love it
adios
The family that I live with.... Mom, 18 year old sister, 16 year old brother.. when Im with the brother and sister.. Trav and Reb.. its like being with yall when we are hyper.. u know when we laugh at everything and the dumbest things are funny... well its like that all the time with my bro and sis.. its hilarious...
My job... I commute back to the mission I was at the first month to work at the school here... Liberty College.. in the morning Im with 6th grade... until Friday only the girls would talk to me, but apparently I became cool on Friday and the boys did... or maybe it was because I could help them with their Math hw.. either or.. ill take it...In the afternoon its high school.. school here is only half a day.. elem and middle school go in the morning... high school in the afternoon. in the afternoon i am with seniors... all my students have been wonderful, patient teachers of spanish. i love both the classes, but especially the students in the afternoon because we are pretty much the same age and we all just talk.. i love it.
living conditions... wonderful.. I live in Llano Largo.. at first me and my friend thought it was going to be lil country town with two houses.. mine and hers.. but its not.. the houses here are the nicest i have seen in guatemala.. one house has a a wide screen tv that is like twice the size of ours at home.. im sure my dad wouuld like it.. in another house a pool table.. neway.. this town is wealthy.. my family is probably the poorest.. but our house is still nice.. nicer than i thought.. i thought i would be using the bathroom in a hole in the ground and showers with buckets... but i have a toilet and shower... and sometimes water.. haha .. thats another story..
in short.. i love it
adios
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Yesterday was mud day..
Woke up got dressed.. jeans, tshirt, and jeans.... clothes that were ready to get dirty...
I was kinda nervous.. I knew last time the team came back people were exhausted.. and alot of people kinda got sick afterwards...
The night before in our group devotions we were each given a word.. mine was endurance.. so thats exactly what I prayed for the nite before and our bus trip there... and thats I and my team got..
Our whole team worked on one house yesterday... The part we worked on was this hallway, connected to 2 rooms.. and then one of these rooms was connected to a whole... Our leaders started assigning jobs.. all the guys were summoned to start filling up buckets of mud and tossing them out of the window.. and then some girls were chosen... it was like being on the price is right.. nikki mashburn come on down..I walked down the steps to began my journey into the mud.. it was like 3 inches below my knew...
went to the first room... we would push the mud towards the window, and someone would stand at the window with a pail throwing it out... I thought just this one room would take all day.. but it only took 20 minutes... we finished that room, the hallway, and the other 2 rooms all that day... we took a lunch break and of course we had some fun along the way... our group is all about singin...
so obviously by the end of this we are completely covered in mud... those of us actually down in the pit of mud..apparently i looked like amazon woman as i had mud all over my face with shovel in hand...whatever i looked like.. i really enjoyed what we did.. thats no lie...
before leaving we had to clean our brooms, shovels, and buckets... so we walked to the river.... as we were washing... i told everyone.. im sorry but i just got to do this... so i just layed down in the river... in its filth and all... but hey... it got the stains out.. eventually we were not only washing the mud off of our equipment.. but our bodies and clothes as well...
it was a great day...
one of the songs we sang...
i wanna be your hands, i wanna be your feet.
i hope these people saw that Jesus was the difference in our life... it was more than just wanting to help these people fix their earthly home... it was ultimately making sure they had an eternal home..
newayzzz.. today normal day ... except...
went to the nursing home... and all the old peeps are lined up in chairs gettin there hair cut... this led to us being asked if we wanted our hair cut... we agreed... 3 of us got hair cuts!!! these girls were just in beauty school.. but hey .. it was free... and it looks pretty good if i say so myself.. its shorter than i thought it would be... but my spanish vocab when it comes to the beauty shop needs some improvement as i found out today...
village tomorrow...
last day here on the compound here Friday..
saturday.. maybe waterfall and making more tortillas with susie
sunday ... antigua!!!
monday... we start gettin shipped out to our houses for the second month!!
mucho amor..
ps... thanks summer camp for your lil notes!! I was just talking to some friends here how its going to feel so weird going back home and not going to summer camp and how much fun I have always had with yall...
Woke up got dressed.. jeans, tshirt, and jeans.... clothes that were ready to get dirty...
I was kinda nervous.. I knew last time the team came back people were exhausted.. and alot of people kinda got sick afterwards...
The night before in our group devotions we were each given a word.. mine was endurance.. so thats exactly what I prayed for the nite before and our bus trip there... and thats I and my team got..
Our whole team worked on one house yesterday... The part we worked on was this hallway, connected to 2 rooms.. and then one of these rooms was connected to a whole... Our leaders started assigning jobs.. all the guys were summoned to start filling up buckets of mud and tossing them out of the window.. and then some girls were chosen... it was like being on the price is right.. nikki mashburn come on down..I walked down the steps to began my journey into the mud.. it was like 3 inches below my knew...
went to the first room... we would push the mud towards the window, and someone would stand at the window with a pail throwing it out... I thought just this one room would take all day.. but it only took 20 minutes... we finished that room, the hallway, and the other 2 rooms all that day... we took a lunch break and of course we had some fun along the way... our group is all about singin...
so obviously by the end of this we are completely covered in mud... those of us actually down in the pit of mud..apparently i looked like amazon woman as i had mud all over my face with shovel in hand...whatever i looked like.. i really enjoyed what we did.. thats no lie...
before leaving we had to clean our brooms, shovels, and buckets... so we walked to the river.... as we were washing... i told everyone.. im sorry but i just got to do this... so i just layed down in the river... in its filth and all... but hey... it got the stains out.. eventually we were not only washing the mud off of our equipment.. but our bodies and clothes as well...
it was a great day...
one of the songs we sang...
i wanna be your hands, i wanna be your feet.
i hope these people saw that Jesus was the difference in our life... it was more than just wanting to help these people fix their earthly home... it was ultimately making sure they had an eternal home..
newayzzz.. today normal day ... except...
went to the nursing home... and all the old peeps are lined up in chairs gettin there hair cut... this led to us being asked if we wanted our hair cut... we agreed... 3 of us got hair cuts!!! these girls were just in beauty school.. but hey .. it was free... and it looks pretty good if i say so myself.. its shorter than i thought it would be... but my spanish vocab when it comes to the beauty shop needs some improvement as i found out today...
village tomorrow...
last day here on the compound here Friday..
saturday.. maybe waterfall and making more tortillas with susie
sunday ... antigua!!!
monday... we start gettin shipped out to our houses for the second month!!
mucho amor..
ps... thanks summer camp for your lil notes!! I was just talking to some friends here how its going to feel so weird going back home and not going to summer camp and how much fun I have always had with yall...
Monday, June 7, 2010
Last week of the first month... wow..
It has gone by so fast.. but at the same time, I feel at home here.. like I have been forever...
So lots has happened since last week. After we got back from helping the people affected by Agatha... we returned.. showered.. ate.. and then had our weekly sport nite with the teens.. I was pretty sure I wasn't going to play soccer... you see before we went out that morning I went running, like I have been doing about every day with one of the girls here... It was a good run.. she pushed me.. I wanted to quit, but she said something to me and I was like heck no I gotta finish.. anyway... the point.. by the time we got to deportes nite.... i was whooped... aka.. really tired..
I wasn't going to play soccer.. just watch... I know shocking... but mostly guys play... once again I now shocking, because thats how it is at Liberty... but its different here... but then ....my former teammate Liz Cook, of the Bettygoats.... my friend Olivia and Roberto.... were in need of a teammate... When they asked me it was like looking at lil puppy dog faces... too hard to resist... so I played...
But when i played I expected to lose in about a minute.. you see once you score the other team gets kicked off... so I was pretty sure us gringos (american slang terms) would instantly be eliminated.... but we rocked.
We probably played in this little area of court for 20 minutes.. the play was fast, hard, agressive, but FUN! I was getting to the point where I just wanted to let them score i was so tired... but then it happened....ball bounced to my feet... shot... SCOREE!!!!
I SCORED A GOAL IN LATIN AMERICA AGAINST LATIN AMERICANS!!! It was the greatest feeling ever... I kinda felt like Brandi Chastain after she scored that winning goal... the difference is I didnt rip my shirt off... but thats how excited I was... my team also rejoicing, celebrated... then roberto for some reason, felt compeled to pick all 3 girls up to show his excitement..
Next morning I woke up.. and felt I had been hit by a train, knocked to a road, and then being run over by a car.. thats how sore I was....As the day continued... woahhh.. I have never been so sore and tired in my life.. dont worry-- didnt run that morning... got up and was going to try... but I only made it to the outside hammock...
The people at the nursing home noticed my tiredness and lack of energy.... I did to.... honestly.. every step was a hassle... even the nite before.. it took everything out of my just to crawl up to the top bunk.. that afternoon VBS... o great kids... I hobbled over to the VBS location, to be told by fellow teammates I looked pale.. which was weird since I was burning up so I expected to by flushed.... took it easy.. someone bought me a gatorade.. nap in hammocks... dinner... o wow...
instantly I could tell I had a fever.. after dinner went back to the house to take my temp and it was a grand total of 103.. haha
so i didnt get to go help dig mud out of houses last thursday... i spent the rest of wed nite trying to get the fever to go down.. it did.. but then came back early thursday mroning b/c i woke up at 2:30 dripping sweat... but.. I'm fine now.. I was a little discouraged i didnt get to go dig out mud.... but as I was laying in the hammock during the rain wed nite.... looking at the stars... I thought maybe God just wanted me to be still.. and know He was God...
So many times I get caught up in doing this for God... I forget to just enjoy sitting at His feet... So instead of serving God last Thursday by digging out mud.. I had some extra quiet time with Him.. and prayed.. alot.. especially for my team... it was a hard day...
No matter what country you are in... Dont forget to take time to Be Still, and Know that God is God..
my team got sooooo muddy... me and this other girl started to wash everyone's clothes after the mud... I got dirty just washing their clothes (which we did in the rain and wtih a washing machine)... it was pretty fun to have our own laundromat....
Me and the team were talking one night about how God put us in the right place at the right time... We havent been affected by any of these "things" that have been occuring in Guatemala.. but we were put in a place that we can go out and help.. God is in control.. in the mud, the rain, and in the lava...
Friday... so more americans arrived... we know have over 50 people living in this missionary house.. they are from Florida... the noise level has def increased.
Saturday... we went to Chiquimula... and went to a MALL!!! with air conditioning!!! and McDonalds!!! it was delicious.. we also went to market in town, followed by a sit down restaurant.. with even more AC... and steak... it was fabulous...that nite we had a campfire and had smores...
Sunday... morning church... music was very polka-ish..... afternoon-- lots of pool, chillin in town... nite--- church with Cubans!! it was definetely the highest energy level we have experience in a church... we probably performed our drama for the last time of the trip... i had a friend take pictures of it.. the pics are pretty awesome, can't wait to show em!!
Today.... the founder of this ministry, took us on a tour of the compound, despite how we are into our 4th week here... haha.. but no.. it was really cool and inspiring... he challenged us to have dreams... but not just dreams... but faith to back these dreams and to make it happen... it was so inspiring that I just wanted to instantly start building a school and nursing home to run beside each other and together (thats a dream I have)... I also just wanted to go adopt a kid!! (another dream... for after marriage : )
O another things... Thursday... I was sick that nite and early morning... but by 11 AM, I was fine and no fever.. so I had alot of free time.. like I said...
I taught myself to play the guitar!! Looked up some chords online.. a Shawn McDonald song.. and Bam!! Theres a couple of guys here who know how to play and have been giving me mini-lessons... I want to keep it up when I get back to the states :D But first I got to find a guitar.. if you have an old one... when july comes around start dusting it off for me!! I really love trying to play.. def need more practice...
As of now... tomorrow we are going to help the storm victims again... I dont have a fever and I feel amazing... so I should be going :D
It has gone by so fast.. but at the same time, I feel at home here.. like I have been forever...
So lots has happened since last week. After we got back from helping the people affected by Agatha... we returned.. showered.. ate.. and then had our weekly sport nite with the teens.. I was pretty sure I wasn't going to play soccer... you see before we went out that morning I went running, like I have been doing about every day with one of the girls here... It was a good run.. she pushed me.. I wanted to quit, but she said something to me and I was like heck no I gotta finish.. anyway... the point.. by the time we got to deportes nite.... i was whooped... aka.. really tired..
I wasn't going to play soccer.. just watch... I know shocking... but mostly guys play... once again I now shocking, because thats how it is at Liberty... but its different here... but then ....my former teammate Liz Cook, of the Bettygoats.... my friend Olivia and Roberto.... were in need of a teammate... When they asked me it was like looking at lil puppy dog faces... too hard to resist... so I played...
But when i played I expected to lose in about a minute.. you see once you score the other team gets kicked off... so I was pretty sure us gringos (american slang terms) would instantly be eliminated.... but we rocked.
We probably played in this little area of court for 20 minutes.. the play was fast, hard, agressive, but FUN! I was getting to the point where I just wanted to let them score i was so tired... but then it happened....ball bounced to my feet... shot... SCOREE!!!!
I SCORED A GOAL IN LATIN AMERICA AGAINST LATIN AMERICANS!!! It was the greatest feeling ever... I kinda felt like Brandi Chastain after she scored that winning goal... the difference is I didnt rip my shirt off... but thats how excited I was... my team also rejoicing, celebrated... then roberto for some reason, felt compeled to pick all 3 girls up to show his excitement..
Next morning I woke up.. and felt I had been hit by a train, knocked to a road, and then being run over by a car.. thats how sore I was....As the day continued... woahhh.. I have never been so sore and tired in my life.. dont worry-- didnt run that morning... got up and was going to try... but I only made it to the outside hammock...
The people at the nursing home noticed my tiredness and lack of energy.... I did to.... honestly.. every step was a hassle... even the nite before.. it took everything out of my just to crawl up to the top bunk.. that afternoon VBS... o great kids... I hobbled over to the VBS location, to be told by fellow teammates I looked pale.. which was weird since I was burning up so I expected to by flushed.... took it easy.. someone bought me a gatorade.. nap in hammocks... dinner... o wow...
instantly I could tell I had a fever.. after dinner went back to the house to take my temp and it was a grand total of 103.. haha
so i didnt get to go help dig mud out of houses last thursday... i spent the rest of wed nite trying to get the fever to go down.. it did.. but then came back early thursday mroning b/c i woke up at 2:30 dripping sweat... but.. I'm fine now.. I was a little discouraged i didnt get to go dig out mud.... but as I was laying in the hammock during the rain wed nite.... looking at the stars... I thought maybe God just wanted me to be still.. and know He was God...
So many times I get caught up in doing this for God... I forget to just enjoy sitting at His feet... So instead of serving God last Thursday by digging out mud.. I had some extra quiet time with Him.. and prayed.. alot.. especially for my team... it was a hard day...
No matter what country you are in... Dont forget to take time to Be Still, and Know that God is God..
my team got sooooo muddy... me and this other girl started to wash everyone's clothes after the mud... I got dirty just washing their clothes (which we did in the rain and wtih a washing machine)... it was pretty fun to have our own laundromat....
Me and the team were talking one night about how God put us in the right place at the right time... We havent been affected by any of these "things" that have been occuring in Guatemala.. but we were put in a place that we can go out and help.. God is in control.. in the mud, the rain, and in the lava...
Friday... so more americans arrived... we know have over 50 people living in this missionary house.. they are from Florida... the noise level has def increased.
Saturday... we went to Chiquimula... and went to a MALL!!! with air conditioning!!! and McDonalds!!! it was delicious.. we also went to market in town, followed by a sit down restaurant.. with even more AC... and steak... it was fabulous...that nite we had a campfire and had smores...
Sunday... morning church... music was very polka-ish..... afternoon-- lots of pool, chillin in town... nite--- church with Cubans!! it was definetely the highest energy level we have experience in a church... we probably performed our drama for the last time of the trip... i had a friend take pictures of it.. the pics are pretty awesome, can't wait to show em!!
Today.... the founder of this ministry, took us on a tour of the compound, despite how we are into our 4th week here... haha.. but no.. it was really cool and inspiring... he challenged us to have dreams... but not just dreams... but faith to back these dreams and to make it happen... it was so inspiring that I just wanted to instantly start building a school and nursing home to run beside each other and together (thats a dream I have)... I also just wanted to go adopt a kid!! (another dream... for after marriage : )
O another things... Thursday... I was sick that nite and early morning... but by 11 AM, I was fine and no fever.. so I had alot of free time.. like I said...
I taught myself to play the guitar!! Looked up some chords online.. a Shawn McDonald song.. and Bam!! Theres a couple of guys here who know how to play and have been giving me mini-lessons... I want to keep it up when I get back to the states :D But first I got to find a guitar.. if you have an old one... when july comes around start dusting it off for me!! I really love trying to play.. def need more practice...
As of now... tomorrow we are going to help the storm victims again... I dont have a fever and I feel amazing... so I should be going :D
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Pretty crazy how the 2 months we are here, the country is experiencing trouble from a volcano and tropical storm.
Don't worry.. I'm fine... our location is not experiencing any difficulty from this.
But many places and people in Guatemala are--we saw that for ourselves for the first time today. We drove for about an hour to go to a place that really suffered from the tropical storm.. It's weird because when I heard "tropical storm" I didn't really flinch or think much would happen, because where I live---it's not that big of a deal... Yeah there's lots of rain, but the only major damage is by the coast.. anyway... this was completely different.
Mud was the major difference... I saw houses completely overtaken by mud.. lodo in Spanish.... We walked around ... well.. tried our best to walk around....but mud gets pretty tricky.. We saw people digging in the mud looking for clothes, and then trying the best they could to wash them... On our way in we would see random piles of "stuff" from a house along with a family... These were the people that had lost their home... they probably slept without a roof last nite..
We were in the bus driving to this one village... and as we rounded a curb we just saw a mass of people... Tons and tons of families... lots of kids... they were all gathered at the church.... The leaders were just making sure that the well that was built last year was still working.. it was.. hence why all the people were gathered... It was honestly like being on the set for one of those commercials you see on TV, asking you to support a child for a dollar a day.... except these kids were ten times cuter and I was looking at them through the window of the bus, not my television screen..
We passed out alot of food today... Once again, I wanted to do so much more... but without hope in Christ... it was hopeless and helpless..
So right now... all I can do is pray for them-- hope you will too.. and I am ready to pass out more food or clean up the mud or something thursday...
Don't worry.. I'm fine... our location is not experiencing any difficulty from this.
But many places and people in Guatemala are--we saw that for ourselves for the first time today. We drove for about an hour to go to a place that really suffered from the tropical storm.. It's weird because when I heard "tropical storm" I didn't really flinch or think much would happen, because where I live---it's not that big of a deal... Yeah there's lots of rain, but the only major damage is by the coast.. anyway... this was completely different.
Mud was the major difference... I saw houses completely overtaken by mud.. lodo in Spanish.... We walked around ... well.. tried our best to walk around....but mud gets pretty tricky.. We saw people digging in the mud looking for clothes, and then trying the best they could to wash them... On our way in we would see random piles of "stuff" from a house along with a family... These were the people that had lost their home... they probably slept without a roof last nite..
We were in the bus driving to this one village... and as we rounded a curb we just saw a mass of people... Tons and tons of families... lots of kids... they were all gathered at the church.... The leaders were just making sure that the well that was built last year was still working.. it was.. hence why all the people were gathered... It was honestly like being on the set for one of those commercials you see on TV, asking you to support a child for a dollar a day.... except these kids were ten times cuter and I was looking at them through the window of the bus, not my television screen..
We passed out alot of food today... Once again, I wanted to do so much more... but without hope in Christ... it was hopeless and helpless..
So right now... all I can do is pray for them-- hope you will too.. and I am ready to pass out more food or clean up the mud or something thursday...
Saturday, May 29, 2010
so no waterfall today because apparently we are experiencing tropical storm agatha.. what a name...
today we just had a free day.. it was great.. despite all the lluvia... we still managed to get in the pool and play volleyball.. still no sign of a tan... except.. i kind of have a chaco tan!!!
rebecca- i felt like you today.. because i had bug bites all up my leg.. lots of us did.. there are more bugs in the rain its crazy!!! some times i feel like God has sent another plague of flies....but neway.. we were playing spoons under a cavana and apparently its prone to bugs.. and a bunch of us had bug bites that formed constellations.. good thing i got an A in astronomy so i could identify them.. haha
this week have been reminded of a lesson that God has already tried to teach me... 2 Cor. 12: 9.. My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weakness so that the power of Christ may rest upon me..
Sometimes i just wish I could do more.. many times this week I wish I knew more Spanish.... Sometimes I wish I was smarter so that I knew how to treat sickness like a doctor... sometimes I wish I was more compassionate and understanding so that I could help people when they were upset and crying... but I myself can not always do this...
When my roommate's brother died, I wanted nothing more than to be able to comfort her... but I myself could not.. I was weak..but I serve a God who is strong.. and so does she.. Many times when people are upset and crying I want to have the right words to say.. but I never feel like I do... but I know that God cares and holds all our tears... One year at the summer camp I work at, I wished more than anything that I could help make a little boy's intense sun burn not hurt, though it was severe enough to cause blisters.. I wish I could have stopped his screams and tears of pain.... but all I could do was give him aloe and try to make him smile...At the nursing home I worked at over Christmas and the one I visit poeple in now.. I wish I was a doctor or nurse or just knew more about the human body to be able to soothen pain or heal...but God is the ultimate healer...
I remember my first couple of days at Carver, and how many times my first couple of days I almost or did break into tears...hopelessness and helplessness are horrible.. I experienced this feelings in the greatest capacity Friday.
This nursing home I have been going to here in Guatemala is soooo different than Carver.. there are no nurses or doctors.. let alone tons of meds.. its simply a place old people live when they have no family... sometimes nurses come in, but they dont work there.. they get fed... i guess that get cleaned.. dont really know... but neway.. the few of us that have been going pretty much just go sit and talk with em... its been alot of fun and they are really good teachers..
Friday I was helping a lady sweep outside.. haha.. remember.. in guat they sweep outside... we were sweeping water so it wouldnt get in her room or build up in the walk way.. I have talked to this lady before and I'm pretty sure I have stepped her room... but I had never seen her roommate until friday..
I feel as though I have a pretty small wrist.. I can hold one wrist with my index finger and thumb of the other hand... I'm pretty sure this lady's thigh was about the size of my wrist...Flies were all over her.. I walked over and started out with an hola, como esta.... but she didnt answer.... i walked back outside and tried to talk to her roommate about her.. wuts her name... how old.. how long has she been here.. wuts wrong with her....
in a nutshell... i know she has been there 10 yrs.. dont know her name... she use to be able to walk when she first got there... but other than that I know and could do nothing... Spanish was a boundary as me and my nursing buddies couldnt really understand the other roommate, a lady that worked there, or the actual lady.... We didnt know if we could move her... she was so fragile and weak... i hate that we could not even know her name....
We decided the only thing we could do is pray... that should have been the first thing... but my instincts took over and i immediately wanted to take action....
but our first action in all circumstance should be to drop to our knees and beg God for guidance and strength.. because we are nothing on our own..
easier said than done.. but I know I need to work on this...
Everything I am, I am in Christ... therefore everything I do by Christ...
until the next time the internet works
today we just had a free day.. it was great.. despite all the lluvia... we still managed to get in the pool and play volleyball.. still no sign of a tan... except.. i kind of have a chaco tan!!!
rebecca- i felt like you today.. because i had bug bites all up my leg.. lots of us did.. there are more bugs in the rain its crazy!!! some times i feel like God has sent another plague of flies....but neway.. we were playing spoons under a cavana and apparently its prone to bugs.. and a bunch of us had bug bites that formed constellations.. good thing i got an A in astronomy so i could identify them.. haha
this week have been reminded of a lesson that God has already tried to teach me... 2 Cor. 12: 9.. My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weakness so that the power of Christ may rest upon me..
Sometimes i just wish I could do more.. many times this week I wish I knew more Spanish.... Sometimes I wish I was smarter so that I knew how to treat sickness like a doctor... sometimes I wish I was more compassionate and understanding so that I could help people when they were upset and crying... but I myself can not always do this...
When my roommate's brother died, I wanted nothing more than to be able to comfort her... but I myself could not.. I was weak..but I serve a God who is strong.. and so does she.. Many times when people are upset and crying I want to have the right words to say.. but I never feel like I do... but I know that God cares and holds all our tears... One year at the summer camp I work at, I wished more than anything that I could help make a little boy's intense sun burn not hurt, though it was severe enough to cause blisters.. I wish I could have stopped his screams and tears of pain.... but all I could do was give him aloe and try to make him smile...At the nursing home I worked at over Christmas and the one I visit poeple in now.. I wish I was a doctor or nurse or just knew more about the human body to be able to soothen pain or heal...but God is the ultimate healer...
I remember my first couple of days at Carver, and how many times my first couple of days I almost or did break into tears...hopelessness and helplessness are horrible.. I experienced this feelings in the greatest capacity Friday.
This nursing home I have been going to here in Guatemala is soooo different than Carver.. there are no nurses or doctors.. let alone tons of meds.. its simply a place old people live when they have no family... sometimes nurses come in, but they dont work there.. they get fed... i guess that get cleaned.. dont really know... but neway.. the few of us that have been going pretty much just go sit and talk with em... its been alot of fun and they are really good teachers..
Friday I was helping a lady sweep outside.. haha.. remember.. in guat they sweep outside... we were sweeping water so it wouldnt get in her room or build up in the walk way.. I have talked to this lady before and I'm pretty sure I have stepped her room... but I had never seen her roommate until friday..
I feel as though I have a pretty small wrist.. I can hold one wrist with my index finger and thumb of the other hand... I'm pretty sure this lady's thigh was about the size of my wrist...Flies were all over her.. I walked over and started out with an hola, como esta.... but she didnt answer.... i walked back outside and tried to talk to her roommate about her.. wuts her name... how old.. how long has she been here.. wuts wrong with her....
in a nutshell... i know she has been there 10 yrs.. dont know her name... she use to be able to walk when she first got there... but other than that I know and could do nothing... Spanish was a boundary as me and my nursing buddies couldnt really understand the other roommate, a lady that worked there, or the actual lady.... We didnt know if we could move her... she was so fragile and weak... i hate that we could not even know her name....
We decided the only thing we could do is pray... that should have been the first thing... but my instincts took over and i immediately wanted to take action....
but our first action in all circumstance should be to drop to our knees and beg God for guidance and strength.. because we are nothing on our own..
easier said than done.. but I know I need to work on this...
Everything I am, I am in Christ... therefore everything I do by Christ...
until the next time the internet works
Friday, May 28, 2010
guess what! i got a chill today b-c i was cold for a second!!! its been rainin quite alot... someone said there was a tropical storm or somethin.. i dont know.. i dont mind the rain bc it does make it cooler.. but it does mean more bichos.. which means bugs
heres a recap of some of the week
tuesday.. we went to a deaf and mute school to perform our program.. which conists of 2 songs in spanish, 2 dramas, and one dance.. dont worry im not one of the dancers... i shared a testimony there as well.. it was quite the experience bc.. they read lips..so i spoke slower than i normally do.. and there was a girl that signed for the older ones that understood that.. by the way spanish-guatemlan sign language is diff than american!
also that day we performed our program in central park, zacapa.. we walked around the city telling ppl that we were going to perform.. and believe it or not.. lots of people came! so .. i gave my testimony there as well.. good thing im loud.. bc it is a park and we were in the city.. so i had to be...
we also went to an orphanage that day as well
wednesday... class in the morning... ministry.. mine is going to the nursing home... lunch.. and then VBS! we are kinda limited in our resources here.. so when it comes to planning for VBS my mind had definetely been stretched... our craft this week was rolling up a piece of paper.. putting hair ties around it, taping a whale and Bible verse on it.. and calling it a tool to proclaim the Gospel... o yeah.. we have to do all this in Spanish... the kids seemed to like it though.. haha.. our story was about Jonah.. and how we need to tell others about Christ... hence why we created megaphones.. haha
that nite.. more visitation! afterwards we usually hit up the local tienda.. for things like coke, shaka laka.. choco milk.. cheetos, helado, you know.. the junk food we americans like. o... they sell bottles of soda here.. but you have to return the bottle.. if you dont want to stick around the store that long.. they put it in a little bag.. its pretty sweet to drink coke from a bag..
thursday was a pretty chill day.. we did our program at the school here.. on the compound we stay on.. i was the MC for one.. that was an experience.. in between performance times we filled bags with food to pass out next tuesday and thursday.. 300 to be exact.. we did this beside the main office here... and we like to sing... so the people in the office enjoyed the plethra of music we performed.. but hey.. it makes the job go fast!
and today.. friday! wooopp woop.. some more class in the manana... nursing home..today we played beauty shop as i did more nails and did some hair... lunch.. nap in the hammock! more nursing home...
fact.. in america we typically sweep inside houses and such.. but in guat.. we do it outside.. like today at the nursing home because of the abundance of water.. i went around and swept the water out into the middle courtyard to drain.. we also swept oustide some yesterday too.. it was crazy
after all that we got some cucos.... its pretty much a taste of heaven... the coffee flavored one tastes like a frozen frappucino.. but they come in little bags and you have to bit the corner of one and then suck on it.... aaahhhh.. its sooo goooooood... and only 2 quetzals.... 7.8 i think is equal to an american dollar..
though i have been doing my share of eating.. i ran every day this week... we have been getting up at the ungodly hour of 6.30... this morning was quite nice because as my and my friend were running someone greeted us with the familiar english phrase [good morning[ but honestly.. the view in the morning along the path we run is breathtaking... alot better than the graveyard at home
another scorpion story.. apparently there was one in our room and a girl was going to kill it but missed it.. it then fell off the wall.. possible into another girls suitcase.. and has yet to be found... them girls tore up the room in search for it.. they even had 2 guys go in there .. i guess because guys can see better... but it was never found... haha.. i slept fine and without worry..
tonite we are having a big party apparently.... we are eating legit guat food and we are having cuban music.... should be fun.. tomorrow we are going to a waterfall!!!
hasta luego
heres a recap of some of the week
tuesday.. we went to a deaf and mute school to perform our program.. which conists of 2 songs in spanish, 2 dramas, and one dance.. dont worry im not one of the dancers... i shared a testimony there as well.. it was quite the experience bc.. they read lips..so i spoke slower than i normally do.. and there was a girl that signed for the older ones that understood that.. by the way spanish-guatemlan sign language is diff than american!
also that day we performed our program in central park, zacapa.. we walked around the city telling ppl that we were going to perform.. and believe it or not.. lots of people came! so .. i gave my testimony there as well.. good thing im loud.. bc it is a park and we were in the city.. so i had to be...
we also went to an orphanage that day as well
wednesday... class in the morning... ministry.. mine is going to the nursing home... lunch.. and then VBS! we are kinda limited in our resources here.. so when it comes to planning for VBS my mind had definetely been stretched... our craft this week was rolling up a piece of paper.. putting hair ties around it, taping a whale and Bible verse on it.. and calling it a tool to proclaim the Gospel... o yeah.. we have to do all this in Spanish... the kids seemed to like it though.. haha.. our story was about Jonah.. and how we need to tell others about Christ... hence why we created megaphones.. haha
that nite.. more visitation! afterwards we usually hit up the local tienda.. for things like coke, shaka laka.. choco milk.. cheetos, helado, you know.. the junk food we americans like. o... they sell bottles of soda here.. but you have to return the bottle.. if you dont want to stick around the store that long.. they put it in a little bag.. its pretty sweet to drink coke from a bag..
thursday was a pretty chill day.. we did our program at the school here.. on the compound we stay on.. i was the MC for one.. that was an experience.. in between performance times we filled bags with food to pass out next tuesday and thursday.. 300 to be exact.. we did this beside the main office here... and we like to sing... so the people in the office enjoyed the plethra of music we performed.. but hey.. it makes the job go fast!
and today.. friday! wooopp woop.. some more class in the manana... nursing home..today we played beauty shop as i did more nails and did some hair... lunch.. nap in the hammock! more nursing home...
fact.. in america we typically sweep inside houses and such.. but in guat.. we do it outside.. like today at the nursing home because of the abundance of water.. i went around and swept the water out into the middle courtyard to drain.. we also swept oustide some yesterday too.. it was crazy
after all that we got some cucos.... its pretty much a taste of heaven... the coffee flavored one tastes like a frozen frappucino.. but they come in little bags and you have to bit the corner of one and then suck on it.... aaahhhh.. its sooo goooooood... and only 2 quetzals.... 7.8 i think is equal to an american dollar..
though i have been doing my share of eating.. i ran every day this week... we have been getting up at the ungodly hour of 6.30... this morning was quite nice because as my and my friend were running someone greeted us with the familiar english phrase [good morning[ but honestly.. the view in the morning along the path we run is breathtaking... alot better than the graveyard at home
another scorpion story.. apparently there was one in our room and a girl was going to kill it but missed it.. it then fell off the wall.. possible into another girls suitcase.. and has yet to be found... them girls tore up the room in search for it.. they even had 2 guys go in there .. i guess because guys can see better... but it was never found... haha.. i slept fine and without worry..
tonite we are having a big party apparently.... we are eating legit guat food and we are having cuban music.... should be fun.. tomorrow we are going to a waterfall!!!
hasta luego
Saturday, May 22, 2010
some differences from Guat. and America I noticed today...
1. Guatemalans do not apply sunscreen like we do. When my momma put on it on my when I was a child, she rubbed it in.... here, people just pretty much slapped it on... so until they got in the water they were as white as us.... this was at the waterpark today which was alot of fun.
2. I have kissed more chicos today than I probably will in my whole life. In Guat, instead of handshakes, they do the kiss on the cheek thing.. its only one... but when I try to think of how many people I kissed today... I lose track... dont worry im still in the VLC
3. You cant fall asleep at church in Guatemala...its too lively
4. The Holy Spirit only works for about an hour in the churches of America, but in Guatemala church can go for like 2 hours...
5. Sitting and talking is entertainment.. not watchin TV, going to the movies, or going to the mall... I have grown accustomed to this already..
6. Another thing I think of as I type on this whack'o keyboard.. in America.. you dont normally have bugs crawling on the screen or around your keyboard.. im just sayin... haha
Every nite my team has a meeting time... past couple of nites, our prof has asked us how we were blessed today..
I said yesterday that me and a friend were going to go learn to make tortillas.. well we went, but the lady was going to church in like 30 minutes..so she asked if we could come tomorrow.. which we instantly agreed to.. after chatting with her I suggested we stop by the nursing home... we had some time to kill... so I thought i would introduce my friend to some of my senior friends... My friend seemed hesitant at first..For some nursing homes are uncomfortable.. I knew what he meant... I had the same thoughts but overcame them quickly when working at Carver over Christmas break.. I told him I knew the perfect person for him to meet.. Paulito.
Paulito is blind... but so kind, generous, and willing to teach me Spanish! He corrects and teaches me words in Spanish.. in return I share a little English with him.. I also read the Bible to him in Spanish..
Anyway..He told us that he had prayed for us last night... I was moved...
Every person that we said hola, que tal... they responded with Estoy contento o Estoy alegre.. .They were happy and content.. The reason they all responded was based on the joy they had in Christ. I dont remember their exact phrases.. aka I didnt always understand everything.. but they all mentioned God and pointed up and then to their heart...
They were satisfied... even being in a nursing home, even being old and sick, even not having a family to come and visit them... they have found fulfillment in life... wow.. what a lesson..
1. Guatemalans do not apply sunscreen like we do. When my momma put on it on my when I was a child, she rubbed it in.... here, people just pretty much slapped it on... so until they got in the water they were as white as us.... this was at the waterpark today which was alot of fun.
2. I have kissed more chicos today than I probably will in my whole life. In Guat, instead of handshakes, they do the kiss on the cheek thing.. its only one... but when I try to think of how many people I kissed today... I lose track... dont worry im still in the VLC
3. You cant fall asleep at church in Guatemala...its too lively
4. The Holy Spirit only works for about an hour in the churches of America, but in Guatemala church can go for like 2 hours...
5. Sitting and talking is entertainment.. not watchin TV, going to the movies, or going to the mall... I have grown accustomed to this already..
6. Another thing I think of as I type on this whack'o keyboard.. in America.. you dont normally have bugs crawling on the screen or around your keyboard.. im just sayin... haha
Every nite my team has a meeting time... past couple of nites, our prof has asked us how we were blessed today..
I said yesterday that me and a friend were going to go learn to make tortillas.. well we went, but the lady was going to church in like 30 minutes..so she asked if we could come tomorrow.. which we instantly agreed to.. after chatting with her I suggested we stop by the nursing home... we had some time to kill... so I thought i would introduce my friend to some of my senior friends... My friend seemed hesitant at first..For some nursing homes are uncomfortable.. I knew what he meant... I had the same thoughts but overcame them quickly when working at Carver over Christmas break.. I told him I knew the perfect person for him to meet.. Paulito.
Paulito is blind... but so kind, generous, and willing to teach me Spanish! He corrects and teaches me words in Spanish.. in return I share a little English with him.. I also read the Bible to him in Spanish..
Anyway..He told us that he had prayed for us last night... I was moved...
Every person that we said hola, que tal... they responded with Estoy contento o Estoy alegre.. .They were happy and content.. The reason they all responded was based on the joy they had in Christ. I dont remember their exact phrases.. aka I didnt always understand everything.. but they all mentioned God and pointed up and then to their heart...
They were satisfied... even being in a nursing home, even being old and sick, even not having a family to come and visit them... they have found fulfillment in life... wow.. what a lesson..
Friday, May 21, 2010
So I always laugh alot...and I have had lots of laughs here in Guatemala and with my team... so many... we are all so different, but put us together and we make quite the comedy show... anyway...
Last nite, after cena, we were told we were going to go visit people in their houses. I was a little concerned, because in the US we dont just walk around the town shouting, Hows it goin.. much less would we get invited in to talk and chat.... well thats exactly what goes on here in Guatemala.
My group and I took a road started shouting and lo and behold we went into a house, that had muchos mangos on the front porch... there was a madre and su hijo and hija.. the little boy had come to our VBS, where I spoke in Spanish about Noe... haha.. but anyway he was talking about how much fun he had.. the conversations continued.. together we did pretty good comprehending and responding.. and then along came Susie..
Susie came to visit her friend...so by this time we probably already had 10 people in the little living room...there was half a seat beside me, so i scooted over and invited her to sit beside me... she did.. and the fun began..
Somehow, I, Susie, and mi nuevo amigo Devin from Oklahoma got to talkin about food. We were talking about the tortillas and how they are so good here because they are homeade. It seems like a simple conversation.. but there were alot of terms and vocab me and Dev were clueless!!! This became so funny to us and Susie...then it got the point where when my and Devin were trying to come together in ingles.... but i didnt understand him in my own native language!!! it was crazy.. all three of us were cracking up uncontrollably... after we calmed down some.. she asked if I wanted to learn how to make them tomorrow afternoon. I wanted to make sure I understand her correctly.. and she said yes tomorrow afternoon.. i would insert a question mark here but this computer is crazy.. but neway...I could not because I am going to the nursing home in the town on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday afternoons... she asked about Saturday.. and I said okay! Devin is coming too.. I guess...
Once again.. the Guatemalans are so generous and welcoming... I mean, we just met this lady.. and she wanted to buy the ingredients to show us how to make this food...
Im going to a waterpark tomorrow... wooopp wooop!!
hasta luego
Last nite, after cena, we were told we were going to go visit people in their houses. I was a little concerned, because in the US we dont just walk around the town shouting, Hows it goin.. much less would we get invited in to talk and chat.... well thats exactly what goes on here in Guatemala.
My group and I took a road started shouting and lo and behold we went into a house, that had muchos mangos on the front porch... there was a madre and su hijo and hija.. the little boy had come to our VBS, where I spoke in Spanish about Noe... haha.. but anyway he was talking about how much fun he had.. the conversations continued.. together we did pretty good comprehending and responding.. and then along came Susie..
Susie came to visit her friend...so by this time we probably already had 10 people in the little living room...there was half a seat beside me, so i scooted over and invited her to sit beside me... she did.. and the fun began..
Somehow, I, Susie, and mi nuevo amigo Devin from Oklahoma got to talkin about food. We were talking about the tortillas and how they are so good here because they are homeade. It seems like a simple conversation.. but there were alot of terms and vocab me and Dev were clueless!!! This became so funny to us and Susie...then it got the point where when my and Devin were trying to come together in ingles.... but i didnt understand him in my own native language!!! it was crazy.. all three of us were cracking up uncontrollably... after we calmed down some.. she asked if I wanted to learn how to make them tomorrow afternoon. I wanted to make sure I understand her correctly.. and she said yes tomorrow afternoon.. i would insert a question mark here but this computer is crazy.. but neway...I could not because I am going to the nursing home in the town on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday afternoons... she asked about Saturday.. and I said okay! Devin is coming too.. I guess...
Once again.. the Guatemalans are so generous and welcoming... I mean, we just met this lady.. and she wanted to buy the ingredients to show us how to make this food...
Im going to a waterpark tomorrow... wooopp wooop!!
hasta luego
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Where to begin......
1. The trip down here was good... didn't get sick or anything! Took Dremamine (sp) and all was well! (Despite traveling 3 hours in an "autobus" w/o AC on crazy roads, after eating at a famous fast food place called Pollo Campero.... we had donuts, pollo frito, and papas fritas... look it up.. it was pretty american).
2. There really aren't as many bugs as I had believed there to be. I don't have to soak my body in bug spray.. a simple spray at nite does it well. I have seen a tarantula and scorpion...but they weren't a threat.
story... last nite.. a girl "saw" the scorpion on the wall (even though the rest of us had the lights out) and leaped out of bed (she's on the top bunk) and smashed the scorpion con la Santa Biblia... she then proceeded to tell everyone (including those still alseep) that couldn't "take it out" It was squished on the wall, and dead... but she couldnt move.... Nor could the 2 girls closest to the smooshed scorpion on the wall.... so I, in barely anything b/c there is no AC, came the rescue... Ah de mi...
We have secret santas amoung the team.... I gave the dead scorpion to my secret santa.. He is one our student leaders.. hahaha
3. Food is AMAZZZING!! Guatemalans like alot of the stuff we have.. They love fried chicken, hence why they have a fastfood restuarant w/ this delicacy (Pollo Campenero) They also like PB&J.. Yesterday I had one with jalea de pina... pineapple jelly!!! Fue muy deliciosa!!
4. People.. We are all getting along and working together o so well. .. Tonite was fun.. We were practicing some songs in Spanish.. and then all of a sudden one of the guys on the team broke out into a Lion King song.... Circle of Life... which then led to singing of other popular songs from movies and the top song charts... O-- the songs we were practicing were about Jesus... but we ended up singing about "all the single ladies"..... haha
Guatemalans... incredibles.. they are all so generous. yesterday at a construction site we mentioned that we liked mangos and un hombre gave us a whole bag of them! they are very welcoming as well.. we walked through the small town outside of the compound we are staying in and everyone came out of their house to see, listen, and talk to us.. Conversations were limited.. but it was so different than America..
Kids.. We did a VBS today... from scratch.. Hable' sobre Noe'.... haha.. We then tried to sing a song I translated into Spanish. El amor de Dios.. God's love is wide and deep and long and high.. I can't really tell if they liked it or not? Yo no se'
My old peeps.. yes yes yes... I'm in a nursing home again... It's very different at this one , compared to Carver.. Especially since I have an even harder time, because they only know Spanish... I will going to the nursing home ever M,W,F... woop woop!!
5. Random stuff: I drank an aloe vera drink.. I received my first text message (I bought a phone down here and you received one when your phone is activated). They have alot drinks in bags!! It's so weird. Freeze tag in Spanish is "chuga" The Cubans that are staying at the same "site" as us... don't belive that I am in the VLC...Guatemalan fruits are sooooo goood... Especialmente la pina! We are called "gringos" by the Guatemalans.. I think it pretty much means we're from America, we speak English.. and possible don't know anything? It's not a term of endearment.. let's just say that...
6... God is working in Guatemala... Already we have seen people accept Christ. One girl led someone to Christ in Spanish..
Guatemala may not have the economy, money, technology, sanitation, or prestige of America.. but one thing is for sure they understand contentment. The people here are happy. Even with little, they give alot. People have been so generous to us... We came to share Christ, but in return have received "some" as well.
sorry for the typos and fragments... but... I got some spanish to do.... :D
hasta luego
mucho amor!
1. The trip down here was good... didn't get sick or anything! Took Dremamine (sp) and all was well! (Despite traveling 3 hours in an "autobus" w/o AC on crazy roads, after eating at a famous fast food place called Pollo Campero.... we had donuts, pollo frito, and papas fritas... look it up.. it was pretty american).
2. There really aren't as many bugs as I had believed there to be. I don't have to soak my body in bug spray.. a simple spray at nite does it well. I have seen a tarantula and scorpion...but they weren't a threat.
story... last nite.. a girl "saw" the scorpion on the wall (even though the rest of us had the lights out) and leaped out of bed (she's on the top bunk) and smashed the scorpion con la Santa Biblia... she then proceeded to tell everyone (including those still alseep) that couldn't "take it out" It was squished on the wall, and dead... but she couldnt move.... Nor could the 2 girls closest to the smooshed scorpion on the wall.... so I, in barely anything b/c there is no AC, came the rescue... Ah de mi...
We have secret santas amoung the team.... I gave the dead scorpion to my secret santa.. He is one our student leaders.. hahaha
3. Food is AMAZZZING!! Guatemalans like alot of the stuff we have.. They love fried chicken, hence why they have a fastfood restuarant w/ this delicacy (Pollo Campenero) They also like PB&J.. Yesterday I had one with jalea de pina... pineapple jelly!!! Fue muy deliciosa!!
4. People.. We are all getting along and working together o so well. .. Tonite was fun.. We were practicing some songs in Spanish.. and then all of a sudden one of the guys on the team broke out into a Lion King song.... Circle of Life... which then led to singing of other popular songs from movies and the top song charts... O-- the songs we were practicing were about Jesus... but we ended up singing about "all the single ladies"..... haha
Guatemalans... incredibles.. they are all so generous. yesterday at a construction site we mentioned that we liked mangos and un hombre gave us a whole bag of them! they are very welcoming as well.. we walked through the small town outside of the compound we are staying in and everyone came out of their house to see, listen, and talk to us.. Conversations were limited.. but it was so different than America..
Kids.. We did a VBS today... from scratch.. Hable' sobre Noe'.... haha.. We then tried to sing a song I translated into Spanish. El amor de Dios.. God's love is wide and deep and long and high.. I can't really tell if they liked it or not? Yo no se'
My old peeps.. yes yes yes... I'm in a nursing home again... It's very different at this one , compared to Carver.. Especially since I have an even harder time, because they only know Spanish... I will going to the nursing home ever M,W,F... woop woop!!
5. Random stuff: I drank an aloe vera drink.. I received my first text message (I bought a phone down here and you received one when your phone is activated). They have alot drinks in bags!! It's so weird. Freeze tag in Spanish is "chuga" The Cubans that are staying at the same "site" as us... don't belive that I am in the VLC...Guatemalan fruits are sooooo goood... Especialmente la pina! We are called "gringos" by the Guatemalans.. I think it pretty much means we're from America, we speak English.. and possible don't know anything? It's not a term of endearment.. let's just say that...
6... God is working in Guatemala... Already we have seen people accept Christ. One girl led someone to Christ in Spanish..
Guatemala may not have the economy, money, technology, sanitation, or prestige of America.. but one thing is for sure they understand contentment. The people here are happy. Even with little, they give alot. People have been so generous to us... We came to share Christ, but in return have received "some" as well.
sorry for the typos and fragments... but... I got some spanish to do.... :D
hasta luego
mucho amor!
Friday, May 14, 2010
Last night...
In about 24 hours, I will be meeting the rest of the team to drive to DC. From DC, we will fly to Atlanta, GA-- and then Guatemala City... it seems so unreal.
I thought I would I be really antsy, jittery tonight...I thought I would have those butterflies you get in your stomach when the person you have a huge crush on smiles at you... I don't feel any of that.. I'm excited--don't get me wrong-- but I'm calm? Could this be that thing called "peace"? Whatever it is-- I'm okay with it. I don't like it when my stomach feels all knotted and weird... haha
1. Thank you, mom.. for all you have done for me for this trip. Packing wasn't that bad since you had been getting stuff together. Love you!
2. Thank you to everyone, anyone who has said that they will be praying for me while I am there.. that really does mean alot. :D
I was thinking today on how this is my 3rd attempt to go on a mission's trip. My youth group was going to Peru one year... and at first I thought I was going.. but then I wasn't... won't get into the details of that.. haha
And then last year, I was suppose to go to Mexico, but this swine flu thing popped up... so now I have the opportunity to go to Guatemala.. for 2 months...
I know we can never fully understand God and His timing... but I still like to attempt. I was thinking about what would have happened if I had gone on those trips. Would I want to go to Guatemala? Would those trips have changed my life, or just the next few months? This week I think God has really been teaching me something... and maybe this can kinda answer why I didn't go on those trips...
I've heard so many people say how this trip is going to change my life... I know what they mean... but I think they have the wording wrong... I agree... this trip does have great potential to alter, flip-flop, and stretch my perspective and thinking. But I don't want this to be a camp thing.
Lots of times when kids/teens go to camp.. decisions made don't last. It's called being on a "camp-high." You could be at camp and decide that you have me the perfect guy/girl and that a long-distance relationship will work.....but it only lasts a week after camp. You could go to camp and decide that you are going to read your Bible for 45 minutes everyday... This goes well, but then school starts and you have homework....
I don't want to have a "Guatemala-high'' when I came back... I do want this trip to truly alter and turn my life upside down... but I know that only God working through this opportunity will cause such effects. I'm looking for God to change my life, yet again. The people of Guatemala will touch and move my heart... just by learning about them, this has already happened, but I need God to turn this touch into something that will change the rest of my life... Keep me accountable so that I don't just have a Guatemala-high when I come back...
maybe I was never mature enough to serve God in a way like this.. maybe it just wouldn't have made sense like it does now. whatever the reason...I'm gonna keep following, learning, maturing, and growing closer to the Most Wonderful, Amazing... God.
Ecclesiastes 3:11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to end.
here it goes...
I thought I would I be really antsy, jittery tonight...I thought I would have those butterflies you get in your stomach when the person you have a huge crush on smiles at you... I don't feel any of that.. I'm excited--don't get me wrong-- but I'm calm? Could this be that thing called "peace"? Whatever it is-- I'm okay with it. I don't like it when my stomach feels all knotted and weird... haha
1. Thank you, mom.. for all you have done for me for this trip. Packing wasn't that bad since you had been getting stuff together. Love you!
2. Thank you to everyone, anyone who has said that they will be praying for me while I am there.. that really does mean alot. :D
I was thinking today on how this is my 3rd attempt to go on a mission's trip. My youth group was going to Peru one year... and at first I thought I was going.. but then I wasn't... won't get into the details of that.. haha
And then last year, I was suppose to go to Mexico, but this swine flu thing popped up... so now I have the opportunity to go to Guatemala.. for 2 months...
I know we can never fully understand God and His timing... but I still like to attempt. I was thinking about what would have happened if I had gone on those trips. Would I want to go to Guatemala? Would those trips have changed my life, or just the next few months? This week I think God has really been teaching me something... and maybe this can kinda answer why I didn't go on those trips...
I've heard so many people say how this trip is going to change my life... I know what they mean... but I think they have the wording wrong... I agree... this trip does have great potential to alter, flip-flop, and stretch my perspective and thinking. But I don't want this to be a camp thing.
Lots of times when kids/teens go to camp.. decisions made don't last. It's called being on a "camp-high." You could be at camp and decide that you have me the perfect guy/girl and that a long-distance relationship will work.....but it only lasts a week after camp. You could go to camp and decide that you are going to read your Bible for 45 minutes everyday... This goes well, but then school starts and you have homework....
I don't want to have a "Guatemala-high'' when I came back... I do want this trip to truly alter and turn my life upside down... but I know that only God working through this opportunity will cause such effects. I'm looking for God to change my life, yet again. The people of Guatemala will touch and move my heart... just by learning about them, this has already happened, but I need God to turn this touch into something that will change the rest of my life... Keep me accountable so that I don't just have a Guatemala-high when I come back...
maybe I was never mature enough to serve God in a way like this.. maybe it just wouldn't have made sense like it does now. whatever the reason...I'm gonna keep following, learning, maturing, and growing closer to the Most Wonderful, Amazing... God.
Ecclesiastes 3:11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to end.
here it goes...
Monday, May 10, 2010
So I just checked the weather for Guatemala City, Guatemala... it's 80 there.. I kinda hope it stays around there for 2 months : )
Yeaaa... I'm suppose to be studying... but that's getting really hard to do. I just want to fastfoward to Wednesday night-- then I could go home and pack and hang out with family and friends before leaving. But.. despite my wishes.. I still have an exam tonight at 6, tomorrow at 1, and Wednesday at 3:30.. bummer dude.. haha
I'm getting sooo excited and nervous at the same time... Yesterday I was getting so worked up over the idea of me going, that I took a break from studying and decided to run to the monogram. From my dorm.. I'd say its about 3 miles or more there and back? maybe? The monogram is this place on the top of the little mountain/hill beside Liberty that has been cleared and rocks have been arranged to say LU. Lots of little trails lead to it, and the view is gorgeous once you get up there. I thought it would be a good place to go to clear my head.
I use to run up there alot my freshman year...
Yeah... I'm not a freshman anymore... At one point of my run I was reminded of the time I ran a 5K with my dad and at the end I told him I would never do that again because I was so tired and felt sick.
So after alot of huffing and puffing.. I made my way up there.. and it was breath-taking.
I felt so small. Not because I had just burned 500+ calories... but because of my view. I looked at my university and it looked so small compared to the majestic mountains that lay behind it. It was all so beautiful. If you're ever stressed out, and you happen to be in Lynchburg, VA-- go to the monogram to get things in perspective.
One of the girls in my prayer group posted this as her status the other day, "You can tell the size of your God by looking at your worry list. The longer your list, the smaller your God." Yeah, I'm super excited about Guatemala... but I'm a human... let alone a girl.. of course there are some things that are worrying me about this trip. I'm nervous.. but I think it's good to be nervous sometimes.. get's ya out of your comfort zone that's for sure...
I don't want to ever stuff God in a box because of my worries and fears ( not just this trip, but life in general)... I and my worries are small when compared to God.. why not just give them to Him from the get-go. That is faith.. daily saying you can't do it, but God can.
For some reason, this song just popped up in my head-- it's a song I learnd when I was but a wee-little girl... maybe the fact that my roommate woke me up to a kiddie Bible song the other day, triggered my memory to recall this one:
"My God is so big, so strong and so powerful there's nothing my God cannot do.
The mountains are His, the valleys are His, the stars are His handiwork, too.
My God is so big, so strong and so powerufl there's nothing my God cannot do."
Asking for perservance and focus to finish my schoolwork.
Begging for God to continue to teach me how to be more like Jesus.
Longing to be a godly, young woman walking by faith... not by sight.
Yeaaa... I'm suppose to be studying... but that's getting really hard to do. I just want to fastfoward to Wednesday night-- then I could go home and pack and hang out with family and friends before leaving. But.. despite my wishes.. I still have an exam tonight at 6, tomorrow at 1, and Wednesday at 3:30.. bummer dude.. haha
I'm getting sooo excited and nervous at the same time... Yesterday I was getting so worked up over the idea of me going, that I took a break from studying and decided to run to the monogram. From my dorm.. I'd say its about 3 miles or more there and back? maybe? The monogram is this place on the top of the little mountain/hill beside Liberty that has been cleared and rocks have been arranged to say LU. Lots of little trails lead to it, and the view is gorgeous once you get up there. I thought it would be a good place to go to clear my head.
I use to run up there alot my freshman year...
Yeah... I'm not a freshman anymore... At one point of my run I was reminded of the time I ran a 5K with my dad and at the end I told him I would never do that again because I was so tired and felt sick.
So after alot of huffing and puffing.. I made my way up there.. and it was breath-taking.
I felt so small. Not because I had just burned 500+ calories... but because of my view. I looked at my university and it looked so small compared to the majestic mountains that lay behind it. It was all so beautiful. If you're ever stressed out, and you happen to be in Lynchburg, VA-- go to the monogram to get things in perspective.
One of the girls in my prayer group posted this as her status the other day, "You can tell the size of your God by looking at your worry list. The longer your list, the smaller your God." Yeah, I'm super excited about Guatemala... but I'm a human... let alone a girl.. of course there are some things that are worrying me about this trip. I'm nervous.. but I think it's good to be nervous sometimes.. get's ya out of your comfort zone that's for sure...
I don't want to ever stuff God in a box because of my worries and fears ( not just this trip, but life in general)... I and my worries are small when compared to God.. why not just give them to Him from the get-go. That is faith.. daily saying you can't do it, but God can.
For some reason, this song just popped up in my head-- it's a song I learnd when I was but a wee-little girl... maybe the fact that my roommate woke me up to a kiddie Bible song the other day, triggered my memory to recall this one:
"My God is so big, so strong and so powerful there's nothing my God cannot do.
The mountains are His, the valleys are His, the stars are His handiwork, too.
My God is so big, so strong and so powerufl there's nothing my God cannot do."
Asking for perservance and focus to finish my schoolwork.
Begging for God to continue to teach me how to be more like Jesus.
Longing to be a godly, young woman walking by faith... not by sight.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
The semester if wrappin up! Project due tomorrow, 1 exam Monday, 1 exam Tuesday, and 2 Wednesday.....then Saturday. back to Liberty to meet my team, drive to DC... and then off to Guatemala...I still can't believe it....
So yesterday in one my classes I felt like a complete idiot. We were watching this video on American education....I saw how much we have digressed... just to say the least. It was embarassing. Some of the math problems 4th grade students had to do in their head, I don't even know if I could have done on paper....it was that bad. It was also interesting to see how much of the Bible they know, becasue then it could and was taught in school. It was taught as though it were the most important book... which it is.
I just felt dumb again. I was reading in John 17. In my Bible it is entitled the "High Priestly Prayer." Jesus is talking about how much He wants us to be one with the Father. To know God, like He does. He wants us to be full of joy. Jesus wants what is best for us...
Then I was thinking back to chapter 11... this is where Jesus raised Lazarus. He made a dead man alive again... after the high priests heard about this they decided Jesus must be put to death (vs. 53).
It reminds me of how, even though we are dead in our sin, Jesus makes us alive. through his death, burial, and most importantly ressurection....
The reason I feel dumb...it's the end of the semester but almost the beginning of another journey. so many thoughts are running through my head.... but really there should just be one... I'm tired, but I don't need rest I need Jesus. I'm scared, but I don't need assurance from people who have been on this trip before, I need Jesus. I'm caught worrying about future plans.... but I need to worry about Jesus. I sometimes find my self wanting things that I know aren't right at this time in my life.... but I should want more of Jesus. He want me to know Him more...He wanted it so bad that He died so that I may life.... now I want to make sure that I live for Him. I need Him... and I want to bring praise to His name.
So yesterday in one my classes I felt like a complete idiot. We were watching this video on American education....I saw how much we have digressed... just to say the least. It was embarassing. Some of the math problems 4th grade students had to do in their head, I don't even know if I could have done on paper....it was that bad. It was also interesting to see how much of the Bible they know, becasue then it could and was taught in school. It was taught as though it were the most important book... which it is.
I just felt dumb again. I was reading in John 17. In my Bible it is entitled the "High Priestly Prayer." Jesus is talking about how much He wants us to be one with the Father. To know God, like He does. He wants us to be full of joy. Jesus wants what is best for us...
Then I was thinking back to chapter 11... this is where Jesus raised Lazarus. He made a dead man alive again... after the high priests heard about this they decided Jesus must be put to death (vs. 53).
It reminds me of how, even though we are dead in our sin, Jesus makes us alive. through his death, burial, and most importantly ressurection....
The reason I feel dumb...it's the end of the semester but almost the beginning of another journey. so many thoughts are running through my head.... but really there should just be one... I'm tired, but I don't need rest I need Jesus. I'm scared, but I don't need assurance from people who have been on this trip before, I need Jesus. I'm caught worrying about future plans.... but I need to worry about Jesus. I sometimes find my self wanting things that I know aren't right at this time in my life.... but I should want more of Jesus. He want me to know Him more...He wanted it so bad that He died so that I may life.... now I want to make sure that I live for Him. I need Him... and I want to bring praise to His name.
Take my moments and my days; let them flow in ceaseless praise.
Take my hands, and let them move at the impulse of Thy love.
Take my feet, and let them be swift and beautiful for Thee.
Take my will, and make it Thine; it shall be no longer mine.
Take my hear, it is Thine own; it shall be They royal throne.
Take my love, my Lord, I pour at Thy feet its treasure store
Take myself, and I will be ever, only, all for Thee.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
I've been at home all weekend.. it's been nice.... I'm sure my mom doesn't like it when she asks me questions about Guatemala that I don't know... which seems to be most of them... ooops.. Hopefully she isn't too stressed out and I can somehow answer all these detailed questions.
It's weird being surrounded by old people-- and when I say old people I'm just referring to the fact that at Liberty I am with 18-23 year olds.. So even if your 25, its like being around older people.
My lunch today was so amazingly good.. nothing new.. just old stuff that I hadn't had in a long time. Vegetables-- the southern way.... soft, mushy, and gushy.. yummmmmm.
So apparently theres like 13 days left before I go to Guatemala.. John Brown, time flies.
I've begun poppin my pills so I don't get malaria or typhoid.. something like that. It was suggested that I eat Activia or yogurt to regulate myself? Ate some of that today..
Someone asked me today why I wanted to Guatemala....there's so much I could have told that person... but I knew that wouldn't really understand and I didn't feel like they were looking for that real answer.. but maybe I should have.. I dont know... but here's why I am going.
Let me just be selfish for a minute:
I want to see places. There's more to this universe than North Carolina and Viriginia. Other countries exist besides America. I love where I live, but I wanna see other places as well. I am proud to be an American, and I feel blessed to have been born here-- I really do-- but I want to see outside too.
I believe in missions. Missions doesn't just happen overseas. It happens where every God's people go. It happens at our schools, work places, and in our community--but it also reaches to the nations. I think its cool that I am going to see a completely different type of missons this summer. I am going into a brand new culture, and brand new language--just trying to show Jesus to some of these people. I already know there will be Christians in Guatemala that will show me Jesus in a way I have never seen. People that literally have nothing, but claim to have everything in Christ. I'm not going to Guatemala to show people how they should live, but who they should live for. I already know I'm going to be learning a thing or two. from these people... or three.. okay-- at least ten or more. Bottom line...God is already working in Guatemala.. and I'm going to witness it.
Language... I don't know when or why or how.... but for some odd reason I like Spanish? Maybe it has something to do with going to Las Palmas so often when they first opened. Maybe I liked the teachers who taught Spanish in my school alot? I don't really know...I just love the language and the culture fascinates me. I am excited to take it all in --though I'm sure it is going to be overwhelming at times..perhaps more than the Southern culture.
But really... not to sound cliche... the doors to this trip, I believe, have been opened. Not just opened-- but propped open, a mat place in front of the door, lights bordering the frame.
You see, when I first looked at Liberty (when I say first looked, I mean when I actually considered it and didn't instantly refure it like I did for a while along with my fellow high school classmates) I noticed that the school took a 2-month trip to Guatemala. I was interested in Spanish, as I still am, and I just thought the trip was really cool. I wanted to go after that point.. not my first summer in college but maybe the second of third...
Semesters went by...Last year I thought I would try a smaller trip before just throwing myself out there in the third world for 2 months. Mexico sounded like a good alternative, but swine flu did not allow this trip to happen. So last summer, I was missiontrip-less.
I was planning on trying to go this summer to Mexico... Then life happened...it happened rather quickly? For some reason, I discovered that with the way classes were offered, I would not be able to graduate on time...YIKKESS indeed. The situation became rather sticky... The biggest frustration was that the classes giving me the problem was Spanish!
I think I thought of every way possible to graduate on time.. switching my beloved Spanish concentration to history (barf), summer school, taking classes while student teaching (not possible)... everything... all these details gave me a headache.... then I remembered... Guatemala. I immediately went and talked to the professor heading the trip-- to see if this woudl work.
I don't want you to think that the sole reason I am going on this trip is so that I can graduate on time-- I believe that is how I got on this trip-- but now why..
the why is actually rather simple now that I think about it.
I'm just a 21 year old tryin to follow God... wherever and whatever that might be..
This time, I think I'm being led into this door that says Guatemala, with a rug in front of it that says Bienvendios!, palm tree lights hanging around it, and inside I hear Spanish music.....
Vamanos
It's weird being surrounded by old people-- and when I say old people I'm just referring to the fact that at Liberty I am with 18-23 year olds.. So even if your 25, its like being around older people.
My lunch today was so amazingly good.. nothing new.. just old stuff that I hadn't had in a long time. Vegetables-- the southern way.... soft, mushy, and gushy.. yummmmmm.
So apparently theres like 13 days left before I go to Guatemala.. John Brown, time flies.
I've begun poppin my pills so I don't get malaria or typhoid.. something like that. It was suggested that I eat Activia or yogurt to regulate myself? Ate some of that today..
Someone asked me today why I wanted to Guatemala....there's so much I could have told that person... but I knew that wouldn't really understand and I didn't feel like they were looking for that real answer.. but maybe I should have.. I dont know... but here's why I am going.
Let me just be selfish for a minute:
I want to see places. There's more to this universe than North Carolina and Viriginia. Other countries exist besides America. I love where I live, but I wanna see other places as well. I am proud to be an American, and I feel blessed to have been born here-- I really do-- but I want to see outside too.
I believe in missions. Missions doesn't just happen overseas. It happens where every God's people go. It happens at our schools, work places, and in our community--but it also reaches to the nations. I think its cool that I am going to see a completely different type of missons this summer. I am going into a brand new culture, and brand new language--just trying to show Jesus to some of these people. I already know there will be Christians in Guatemala that will show me Jesus in a way I have never seen. People that literally have nothing, but claim to have everything in Christ. I'm not going to Guatemala to show people how they should live, but who they should live for. I already know I'm going to be learning a thing or two. from these people... or three.. okay-- at least ten or more. Bottom line...God is already working in Guatemala.. and I'm going to witness it.
Language... I don't know when or why or how.... but for some odd reason I like Spanish? Maybe it has something to do with going to Las Palmas so often when they first opened. Maybe I liked the teachers who taught Spanish in my school alot? I don't really know...I just love the language and the culture fascinates me. I am excited to take it all in --though I'm sure it is going to be overwhelming at times..perhaps more than the Southern culture.
But really... not to sound cliche... the doors to this trip, I believe, have been opened. Not just opened-- but propped open, a mat place in front of the door, lights bordering the frame.
You see, when I first looked at Liberty (when I say first looked, I mean when I actually considered it and didn't instantly refure it like I did for a while along with my fellow high school classmates) I noticed that the school took a 2-month trip to Guatemala. I was interested in Spanish, as I still am, and I just thought the trip was really cool. I wanted to go after that point.. not my first summer in college but maybe the second of third...
Semesters went by...Last year I thought I would try a smaller trip before just throwing myself out there in the third world for 2 months. Mexico sounded like a good alternative, but swine flu did not allow this trip to happen. So last summer, I was missiontrip-less.
I was planning on trying to go this summer to Mexico... Then life happened...it happened rather quickly? For some reason, I discovered that with the way classes were offered, I would not be able to graduate on time...YIKKESS indeed. The situation became rather sticky... The biggest frustration was that the classes giving me the problem was Spanish!
I think I thought of every way possible to graduate on time.. switching my beloved Spanish concentration to history (barf), summer school, taking classes while student teaching (not possible)... everything... all these details gave me a headache.... then I remembered... Guatemala. I immediately went and talked to the professor heading the trip-- to see if this woudl work.
I don't want you to think that the sole reason I am going on this trip is so that I can graduate on time-- I believe that is how I got on this trip-- but now why..
the why is actually rather simple now that I think about it.
I'm just a 21 year old tryin to follow God... wherever and whatever that might be..
This time, I think I'm being led into this door that says Guatemala, with a rug in front of it that says Bienvendios!, palm tree lights hanging around it, and inside I hear Spanish music.....
Vamanos
Thursday, April 29, 2010
So if my mom saw my dorm room now she would flip.... I'm going home tomorrow and I'm tryin' to take as much stuff as I can. It will make it easier 2 Wednesdays from now when I finish exams and go home. You see, I always do this. When I start packing or "cleaning out" reallly good---I spread out everything and then in the middle of this process I get bored or tired and just stop. Like now, I've stopped--even though you can barely walk in our room-- not to mention there is pile of stuff right outside my dorm.
Me and my "apartmentmates" were talking about this today... It's not that school is stressing us out, but everything else we have to do + school. I agree--except I don't get stressed out... I laugh in the face of overwhelming amounts of homework and projects... most of the time. I'm not gonna lie... I'm tired right...very tired... and apparently I look like it too-- according to the girls in my prayer group-- haha. But I'm still good.
It really is overwhelming... but that just makes it exciting. right?
Today was a crazy day for me... but man, was God there.
I volunteered to judge a science fair for a local middle school. Me and a friend on the hall, who is also an education major were going together to be judge. I told her to be ready at 8:30 and I would drive. We were suppose to arrive at 9..
Well as you probably predicted.. I woke up late.. At 8:35, I heard a polite little knock at my door. I instantly jumped up, realizing what I had done. Went ahead and threw on my skirt from yesterday-- dashed to the door-- told my friend I would be ready in a minute..threw on my shirt from yesterday-- tamed my hair-- attempted to get rid of my horrible morning breath--and called it a done job. We then left, found the school, got their on time... no one even knew. Thanks for waking me up my fellow educator!
1st place went to "Make a Wave in Science"
2nd was something to do with the soil
and 3rd was "Seismograph" ...it was really cool
This took alot longer to do than anticipated.... it took up the time I was suppose to finish my astronomy problems..
Got back to school and went to La Carretta with a good friend and my roomie... gotta get use to eatin' rice, beans, and salsa ya know...
Shower...it was needed
By the grace of my calculator and a friend I ran into from my astronomy class...I finsihed my problems... Couldn't have done unless she was there to help me... Usually I get them... but you see... when we were doing them in class... I was daydreamin' about Guatemala...(for real... one day I missed half a page of notes).
Meeting about apartment.. can't wait.. still can't believe we have the apartment we have.. and I am going to live with my best friends at Liberty!
Dinner.
I was suppose to go to a Workshop for Education... but it got canceled.... I needed that.. Thanks God.
God is in the big things and the little.
God knows what and when I need things---tonight, I just needed a couple of hours to chill & pack...
I'm tired... but that's okay.
Matthew 11:28-30
Me and my "apartmentmates" were talking about this today... It's not that school is stressing us out, but everything else we have to do + school. I agree--except I don't get stressed out... I laugh in the face of overwhelming amounts of homework and projects... most of the time. I'm not gonna lie... I'm tired right...very tired... and apparently I look like it too-- according to the girls in my prayer group-- haha. But I'm still good.
It really is overwhelming... but that just makes it exciting. right?
Today was a crazy day for me... but man, was God there.
I volunteered to judge a science fair for a local middle school. Me and a friend on the hall, who is also an education major were going together to be judge. I told her to be ready at 8:30 and I would drive. We were suppose to arrive at 9..
Well as you probably predicted.. I woke up late.. At 8:35, I heard a polite little knock at my door. I instantly jumped up, realizing what I had done. Went ahead and threw on my skirt from yesterday-- dashed to the door-- told my friend I would be ready in a minute..threw on my shirt from yesterday-- tamed my hair-- attempted to get rid of my horrible morning breath--and called it a done job. We then left, found the school, got their on time... no one even knew. Thanks for waking me up my fellow educator!
1st place went to "Make a Wave in Science"
2nd was something to do with the soil
and 3rd was "Seismograph" ...it was really cool
This took alot longer to do than anticipated.... it took up the time I was suppose to finish my astronomy problems..
Got back to school and went to La Carretta with a good friend and my roomie... gotta get use to eatin' rice, beans, and salsa ya know...
Shower...it was needed
By the grace of my calculator and a friend I ran into from my astronomy class...I finsihed my problems... Couldn't have done unless she was there to help me... Usually I get them... but you see... when we were doing them in class... I was daydreamin' about Guatemala...(for real... one day I missed half a page of notes).
Meeting about apartment.. can't wait.. still can't believe we have the apartment we have.. and I am going to live with my best friends at Liberty!
Dinner.
I was suppose to go to a Workshop for Education... but it got canceled.... I needed that.. Thanks God.
God is in the big things and the little.
God knows what and when I need things---tonight, I just needed a couple of hours to chill & pack...
I'm tired... but that's okay.
Matthew 11:28-30
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
So because I have a hard time falling asleep, I've been reading a book at night. I read it last summer, as part of my devotions. Last night, a really cool analogy was given.
One night a man is driving on the road and a deer jumps out in front of him. Luckily, the deer wasn't hurt or his car damaged.
Another night, a deer runs out in front of a car. The impact caused it to go right over the car and then landed behind the car. The car suffered minimum damage. The person in this car was a little shaken up, and affected their drivig the next few weeks.
One day a couple was driving through the countryside, windows down because it was such a nice, beautiful day They say a deer stumbling down a hillside next to the road in front of the. They had seen deer do this many times before, but this deer wasn't stoppin! Somehow, when the deer got to the bottom of the hill, the car was right there as well. The deer dove headfirst into the open window of the car into the lap of the wife. The deer started jumpin and jivin. As expected, this left quite a bit of damage to their car and forever changed the driving habits of that couple.
"All three of these stories involved a collision with a deer, each with very different results. In the same way, each of us will have an encounter with God. For some of us, an encounter with God produces no change in who we are and how we live. For others, God might collide with us, and it changed us temporariy. However for some of us, a head-on collision with the living, holy God will ruin us-alter us forever. "
Which is true of mine and your collisions with God?
One night a man is driving on the road and a deer jumps out in front of him. Luckily, the deer wasn't hurt or his car damaged.
Another night, a deer runs out in front of a car. The impact caused it to go right over the car and then landed behind the car. The car suffered minimum damage. The person in this car was a little shaken up, and affected their drivig the next few weeks.
One day a couple was driving through the countryside, windows down because it was such a nice, beautiful day They say a deer stumbling down a hillside next to the road in front of the. They had seen deer do this many times before, but this deer wasn't stoppin! Somehow, when the deer got to the bottom of the hill, the car was right there as well. The deer dove headfirst into the open window of the car into the lap of the wife. The deer started jumpin and jivin. As expected, this left quite a bit of damage to their car and forever changed the driving habits of that couple.
"All three of these stories involved a collision with a deer, each with very different results. In the same way, each of us will have an encounter with God. For some of us, an encounter with God produces no change in who we are and how we live. For others, God might collide with us, and it changed us temporariy. However for some of us, a head-on collision with the living, holy God will ruin us-alter us forever. "
Which is true of mine and your collisions with God?
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Tonight I was chillin' with some girls in my prayer group before hall meeting (we had been practicing for the "dance-off"). I was having such a hard time keepin my eyes open.. which was weird becaue it was only 9 o clock--that's prime time for us college students. Anywayzz-- I asked them if I looked tired, because I felt sooo tired, but I didn't think I should be? They told me right away that I did....That really boosted my self-esteem. I love looking tired! I asked if it was because I didn't have eye make-up on.. they said no-- I looked more tired than normal (which made me think I always look tired). Once again.. a definite ego-booster.
Spring semester is like a love/hate relationship. It's great because summer is just around the corner, the weather warms up, and my birthday is in March...The bad thing is pollen (which I'm okay with now, the rain washed it away) and you have to do allllll kinds of stuff for next semester!
I hate details...My mom can attest to that. I'm okay not knowing everything and just going with the flow. I get that from my dad. I like being sponatenous. My mom calls it "care-free." So having to pick classes next year, looking for places to live, and even thinking about student teaching for next year drives me up the wall. Can I not just live this day? Geewhizzz what if Jesus comes back before Guatemala? O yeah-- Guatemala, as you suspect, requires me to do all that detail stuff as well.
I hope I'm not complaining.. I'm not.. I know details are good and required-- it's just not my forte. If you need some creativity or spontaneity-- look me up
The point of all this. The end of the semester is rapidly approaching which means Guatemala is right around the corner... AHHHHH!!!! Lots to get done before then... but it makes me sooo excitied... ( when I get over my strong dislike for details)...
I don't know about you, but when I was little I use to not be able to sleep well before the first day of school. Did you know that mom? I would just lay in my bed for the longest time wondering about what would happen that school year! What would my friends look like? What would we learn? Would our teacher be Hitler or an angel? Tons of homework or a teacher who didn't believe in homework (my 4th grade teacher!!!).... Tons of thoughts. Even in college I do this... before the first day of classes. It's just so exciting, especially in college, to meet new people and be in a new environment-- even if it is just a different classroom.
I like new things... alot. So Guatemala arouses me beyond all excitment. New country.. new people....new language... new food.. new culture... new music.. new churches.. new everything!
Those nights before the first day of school....I'm having them now.. the nights before my first time out of the country. the first time on a missions trip.. .the first time being away from my family this long....
sweet dreams...
Spring semester is like a love/hate relationship. It's great because summer is just around the corner, the weather warms up, and my birthday is in March...The bad thing is pollen (which I'm okay with now, the rain washed it away) and you have to do allllll kinds of stuff for next semester!
I hate details...My mom can attest to that. I'm okay not knowing everything and just going with the flow. I get that from my dad. I like being sponatenous. My mom calls it "care-free." So having to pick classes next year, looking for places to live, and even thinking about student teaching for next year drives me up the wall. Can I not just live this day? Geewhizzz what if Jesus comes back before Guatemala? O yeah-- Guatemala, as you suspect, requires me to do all that detail stuff as well.
I hope I'm not complaining.. I'm not.. I know details are good and required-- it's just not my forte. If you need some creativity or spontaneity-- look me up
The point of all this. The end of the semester is rapidly approaching which means Guatemala is right around the corner... AHHHHH!!!! Lots to get done before then... but it makes me sooo excitied... ( when I get over my strong dislike for details)...
I don't know about you, but when I was little I use to not be able to sleep well before the first day of school. Did you know that mom? I would just lay in my bed for the longest time wondering about what would happen that school year! What would my friends look like? What would we learn? Would our teacher be Hitler or an angel? Tons of homework or a teacher who didn't believe in homework (my 4th grade teacher!!!).... Tons of thoughts. Even in college I do this... before the first day of classes. It's just so exciting, especially in college, to meet new people and be in a new environment-- even if it is just a different classroom.
I like new things... alot. So Guatemala arouses me beyond all excitment. New country.. new people....new language... new food.. new culture... new music.. new churches.. new everything!
Those nights before the first day of school....I'm having them now.. the nights before my first time out of the country. the first time on a missions trip.. .the first time being away from my family this long....
sweet dreams...
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Everyone loves music.. I don't care who you are where you live.. we all like some kind of music. I too love music... I like being at home all by myself and playing the piano to songs I know (when I'm by myself I belt it like I were on stage.. o and like I had an amazing voice.) Among my friends, I am known for making parodies to songs. I can't do this on command.. only when I "feel it." My best one by far was when I was with my roommies last semester and I thought I was gonna puke. Another thing.. I don't normally remember thy lyrics after I write them.. but that one was to the "Desert Song" --"This is my prayer in this car, when everything inside feels like its going to come up? " Don't exactly remember.. but hopefully I painted a picture for you.
Over the past two years there have been some songs that have really meant alot to me. It's like I would learn something about God or He would be teaching me something and then like Emeril says, "BAM"-- I hear a song about it. I love it when that happens. Hearing the right song at the right time... now that's a good thing
At Liberty we have to attend 3 convocations (chapels) a week. Last Friday, I heard a song I needed to hear. Here's the lyrics... Don't worry I didn't change them to make a parody.
I made you promises a thousand times
I tried to hear from heaven
But I talked the whole time
I think I make you too small
I never feared you at all no
If you touched my face would I know you?
Looked into my eyes could I behold you?
What do I know of you
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
but the shore along your ocean?
Are you fire? Are you fury?
Are you sacred? Are you beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of holy?
I guess I thought I had you figured you out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How you were might to save
Those were only empty words on a page
Then I caugh a glimpse of who you might be
The slightest hint of you brought me down to my knees.
What do I know of holy?
What do I know wounds that will heal my shame?
And a God who gave life it's name?
What do Iknow of holy?
Of the one who the angels praise?
All creation knows your name?
On earth and heaven above
What do I know of this love?
Lately, with this whole worry of not being real or genuine in my faith...I think I have forgotten some key elements... The words to this song helped me focus everything back into perspective.
Over the past two years there have been some songs that have really meant alot to me. It's like I would learn something about God or He would be teaching me something and then like Emeril says, "BAM"-- I hear a song about it. I love it when that happens. Hearing the right song at the right time... now that's a good thing
At Liberty we have to attend 3 convocations (chapels) a week. Last Friday, I heard a song I needed to hear. Here's the lyrics... Don't worry I didn't change them to make a parody.
I made you promises a thousand times
I tried to hear from heaven
But I talked the whole time
I think I make you too small
I never feared you at all no
If you touched my face would I know you?
Looked into my eyes could I behold you?
What do I know of you
Who spoke me into motion?
Where have I even stood
but the shore along your ocean?
Are you fire? Are you fury?
Are you sacred? Are you beautiful?
What do I know? What do I know of holy?
I guess I thought I had you figured you out
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How you were might to save
Those were only empty words on a page
Then I caugh a glimpse of who you might be
The slightest hint of you brought me down to my knees.
What do I know of holy?
What do I know wounds that will heal my shame?
And a God who gave life it's name?
What do Iknow of holy?
Of the one who the angels praise?
All creation knows your name?
On earth and heaven above
What do I know of this love?
Lately, with this whole worry of not being real or genuine in my faith...I think I have forgotten some key elements... The words to this song helped me focus everything back into perspective.
I know so little about the God that knows me so well.
That explains these thoughts of not feeling real... how can you serve, promote, talk about, model, show, write about, read about something... if you don't know about it. The something I don't know as well as I thought is not a something but a someone... God.
Taking that line that says "have I even stood upon your ocean." I don't even know if I have yet to even test out the water... I think right now I'm preparing too. I'm putting on my sunscreen, gettting my goggles, and I got my raft. Now it's time to take the dive.
God, help me know You more. Give me understanding to help me comprehend the depths of your love, your grace, your mercy, your faithfulness, your forgiveness..... help me better understand the depths of Who You Are..
"I thought I had you figured out...but then I caught a glimpse of who you might be."
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
$3,650 is what I needed by Friday... I got $3,756 in my account right now. First I would like to Thank God for working everything out.. and being in control like He always is :D You see there was a check that got lost in the mail.. and I was getting a little nervous.. but it got here! Even though we can't always trust the mail services, we can trust God, right?
Second THANK YOU to everyone who contributed finicially. I am still in shock from the abundance of generosity shown. I truly appreciate it and it means so much to have people care about this. Thank you :D
Another cool thing. If you do the math, I roughly have $100 left over (which will go towards my tuition for the classes I will be taking my first month down there). Guess how much money I had to go ahead and pull out of my own account to turn in to meet deadlines? Yep.. $100 dollars. Thank you God. I love moments like these.
I was having a conversation with a guy in my brother dorm a couple of weeks ago... started out just as a normal, polite conversation. "How are you doing, Nikki?" and then I said "Wonderful!" Apparently I said it really enthusiastically, because he questioned if there was any special reason why? After laughing at this, I said "Well, technically I always have joy, but today I am extra-happy." I think that we can always be joyful... nothing can take away our true joy, which is salvation in Christ. Happiness, on the otherhand, I think that we control. Anyways.. I told him that today I just felt extra-blessed. It wasn't that I was more blessed that day than any other day. Everyday of my life I have been richly blessed; it is just that some days I am aware of it more than others.
Tonight in my prayer leader class (I am on leadership for my hall here at Liberty as a prayer leader; we must attend a weekly class for training), the stat was given that we were in the 1%... One percent of the world gets to go to college.
Just by going to college I am in the 1%, but I wonder how many in the 1% have a relationship that will last for eternity with the God of the Universe?
I wonder how many of that 1% has a family that loves them.. they may not always like her, but they definetely love her.. and always show it.. more than they should.
I question how many of that 1% has friends that constantly blow her mind--friends that are still her friends even after she has mistreated them at some point in life. Friends that build her up and always "got her back."
I wonder how many have a roommate.. who they now consider a best friend after 3 years-- a best friend that has been a living model of faith for them to look to daily and who sometimes acts like their mom when needed.
I wonder out of that 1% how many have a chance to go to another country for the summer... I could keep going... I think 1% looks big to the percentage I'm in, and I didn't even finish my list.
I am richly blessed everyday... but today was one of those days where it was brought to my attention even more.
Second THANK YOU to everyone who contributed finicially. I am still in shock from the abundance of generosity shown. I truly appreciate it and it means so much to have people care about this. Thank you :D
Another cool thing. If you do the math, I roughly have $100 left over (which will go towards my tuition for the classes I will be taking my first month down there). Guess how much money I had to go ahead and pull out of my own account to turn in to meet deadlines? Yep.. $100 dollars. Thank you God. I love moments like these.
I was having a conversation with a guy in my brother dorm a couple of weeks ago... started out just as a normal, polite conversation. "How are you doing, Nikki?" and then I said "Wonderful!" Apparently I said it really enthusiastically, because he questioned if there was any special reason why? After laughing at this, I said "Well, technically I always have joy, but today I am extra-happy." I think that we can always be joyful... nothing can take away our true joy, which is salvation in Christ. Happiness, on the otherhand, I think that we control. Anyways.. I told him that today I just felt extra-blessed. It wasn't that I was more blessed that day than any other day. Everyday of my life I have been richly blessed; it is just that some days I am aware of it more than others.
Tonight in my prayer leader class (I am on leadership for my hall here at Liberty as a prayer leader; we must attend a weekly class for training), the stat was given that we were in the 1%... One percent of the world gets to go to college.
Just by going to college I am in the 1%, but I wonder how many in the 1% have a relationship that will last for eternity with the God of the Universe?
I wonder how many of that 1% has a family that loves them.. they may not always like her, but they definetely love her.. and always show it.. more than they should.
I question how many of that 1% has friends that constantly blow her mind--friends that are still her friends even after she has mistreated them at some point in life. Friends that build her up and always "got her back."
I wonder how many have a roommate.. who they now consider a best friend after 3 years-- a best friend that has been a living model of faith for them to look to daily and who sometimes acts like their mom when needed.
I wonder out of that 1% how many have a chance to go to another country for the summer... I could keep going... I think 1% looks big to the percentage I'm in, and I didn't even finish my list.
I am richly blessed everyday... but today was one of those days where it was brought to my attention even more.
Psalm 92:4
For you, O Lord, have made me glad by your work;
at the works of your hands I sing for joy.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
26 days till Guatemala...and it still has not set in that I am going. I have been overwhelmed with the generosity and support of my family, my church family, and even just friends of the family. My mom has started "collecting" toiletries, people I don't even know that well have sent money, people ask me about it at church just wanting to know more--so many people care about this.
THANK YOU! for those of you who contributed to my trip--whether finicial or prayer--I apreciate it so much. I don't deserve it.
Like in my last post...I've really been evaluating how real and genuine I am about my faith. Last night I had a good talk with a good friend about it-- it helped out.. Thanks ;D I have too many great friends.. once again... I don't deserve them.
It's my third year at Liberty and I have noticed a trend. When it gets close to the end of the semester its so easy to become short-term minded. Even at a Christian college... we get tied up in exams, summer plans, plans for next year... it really does have potential to be stressful. Being in college isn't just about passing the tests or even getting the degree. It's so much more... it's living for God. Easy to say--but for many, including myself at times, it's hard to keep this mindset.
It's about eternity.. not getting the diploma, not landing the career, not even finding Mr. Right.
We often quote Philippians 3:14 when feeling overwhelmed.. "I press toward the goal." For me, the goal is not finishing this semester, it's not about completing a 2-month trip to Guatemala, graduating from college, landing the perfect teaching job.. not even settling down and having a family. My goal won't be finished until I see Jesus' face... and I don't know when that is...
But I am going to keep running towards Him, knowing that I am nothing of myself. I need Him. My everything is in Him. I so badly crave the "righteousness that comes from faith," not just from yourself (Phil. 3:8). It's more than just being a good person or "Christian-like"... Anyone can put on a show.. but I want a real passion to burn in my heart. Not a passion of solely doing good, but a passion for eternity.. a passion for God and furthering His Kingdom.
I have so much to work on, and one thing for sure--though I am 21.. I don't have time to take a break from working towards this goal of just knowing God more and more. I have so far to go...I always will until heaven.
"Break my pride till all I see....is all of you, uncovering me."
THANK YOU! for those of you who contributed to my trip--whether finicial or prayer--I apreciate it so much. I don't deserve it.
Like in my last post...I've really been evaluating how real and genuine I am about my faith. Last night I had a good talk with a good friend about it-- it helped out.. Thanks ;D I have too many great friends.. once again... I don't deserve them.
It's my third year at Liberty and I have noticed a trend. When it gets close to the end of the semester its so easy to become short-term minded. Even at a Christian college... we get tied up in exams, summer plans, plans for next year... it really does have potential to be stressful. Being in college isn't just about passing the tests or even getting the degree. It's so much more... it's living for God. Easy to say--but for many, including myself at times, it's hard to keep this mindset.
It's about eternity.. not getting the diploma, not landing the career, not even finding Mr. Right.
We often quote Philippians 3:14 when feeling overwhelmed.. "I press toward the goal." For me, the goal is not finishing this semester, it's not about completing a 2-month trip to Guatemala, graduating from college, landing the perfect teaching job.. not even settling down and having a family. My goal won't be finished until I see Jesus' face... and I don't know when that is...
But I am going to keep running towards Him, knowing that I am nothing of myself. I need Him. My everything is in Him. I so badly crave the "righteousness that comes from faith," not just from yourself (Phil. 3:8). It's more than just being a good person or "Christian-like"... Anyone can put on a show.. but I want a real passion to burn in my heart. Not a passion of solely doing good, but a passion for eternity.. a passion for God and furthering His Kingdom.
I have so much to work on, and one thing for sure--though I am 21.. I don't have time to take a break from working towards this goal of just knowing God more and more. I have so far to go...I always will until heaven.
God, You have overwhelmed me.
Fix my heart God.
Mend it and mold it to be like Yours.
Set my heart on You and my eyes on eternity.
Not so that I am a better Christian...
I will never be good enough to deserve You or the blessings that come from You...
but so that ultimately,
You are glorified.
"Break my pride till all I see....is all of you, uncovering me."
Sunday, April 11, 2010
I'm tired of mediocrity... I'm frustrated with complacency... I just want to be real...
Easier said than done right?
Do you ever come to a point where you question your own validity? For me lately I haven't been questioning my salvation.. it has been more of how am I really living out my faith.
My greatest fear in life is being a hypocrite.
I don't want to just blend in with the crowd that surrounds me. I love the college I go to...don't get me wrong...but I hope that the Christian atmosphere that encloses me is not a hinderance... but an aid to growth. Lately, I've been wondering which one it is. Is it becoming so easy to "say the right thing" and "do the right thing," that I have forgotten what true faith in God is? Faith is constantly saying to God.. I can't do anything without you.. I need you and trust you. I hope that Liberty has not become a SparkNotes book on how to pass tests of faith.
I just want to be genuine.. is that too much to ask? I want the things I do to mirror what's on my heart. With that said, it starts in my heart. I want a real love for God; I don't want to just say it. I want to yearn, desire, and desperately want God. He is more than just my way to heaven. I want this love that I have for God to spew over like water in a boiling pot! I want to love others... not just because I am told I am suppose to... but because I see people as God's people--people He created and formed who have the same chance as I to personally know Him.
Having a right heart will lead to doing the right things. I don't want to just go to church, do my devotions, go to a christian college, go on a missions trip, just because I am a "christian." No... I want to do these things because of the conditon of my heart--my heart that is overwhelmed by God. I don't just want to help people out because that is the nice thing to do. The central desire is God's love. I don't help the less fortunate or be nice to my enemies, just to gain brownie points... Once again..I want to do this because I am genuinly star-struck by God and His love for me.
I'm tired of standing on the fence.. It's time to pick a side.
God... search me.. know me... try me and see...
Easier said than done right?
Do you ever come to a point where you question your own validity? For me lately I haven't been questioning my salvation.. it has been more of how am I really living out my faith.
My greatest fear in life is being a hypocrite.
I don't want to just blend in with the crowd that surrounds me. I love the college I go to...don't get me wrong...but I hope that the Christian atmosphere that encloses me is not a hinderance... but an aid to growth. Lately, I've been wondering which one it is. Is it becoming so easy to "say the right thing" and "do the right thing," that I have forgotten what true faith in God is? Faith is constantly saying to God.. I can't do anything without you.. I need you and trust you. I hope that Liberty has not become a SparkNotes book on how to pass tests of faith.
I just want to be genuine.. is that too much to ask? I want the things I do to mirror what's on my heart. With that said, it starts in my heart. I want a real love for God; I don't want to just say it. I want to yearn, desire, and desperately want God. He is more than just my way to heaven. I want this love that I have for God to spew over like water in a boiling pot! I want to love others... not just because I am told I am suppose to... but because I see people as God's people--people He created and formed who have the same chance as I to personally know Him.
Having a right heart will lead to doing the right things. I don't want to just go to church, do my devotions, go to a christian college, go on a missions trip, just because I am a "christian." No... I want to do these things because of the conditon of my heart--my heart that is overwhelmed by God. I don't just want to help people out because that is the nice thing to do. The central desire is God's love. I don't help the less fortunate or be nice to my enemies, just to gain brownie points... Once again..I want to do this because I am genuinly star-struck by God and His love for me.
I'm tired of standing on the fence.. It's time to pick a side.
God... search me.. know me... try me and see...
Monday, March 15, 2010
GoodWill
I went to Good Will today to buy some clothes for my missions trip. My intent is to be able to leave some clothes in Guatemala for some people...
Is this thinking right? Technically, I will be giving someone "the shirt off my back?" I don't normally shop at GoodWill unless I am with one my best friends who does it (who might I mention is a pro at it and everytime I go w/ her I do find something really cool, usually not clothes though) or if I am in search for a ridiculous costume to wear for Halloween at Liberty... but other than that....You don't catch me there .
I'm not putting down GoodWill or those that shop there ( I will tell you about my awesome purchases later).. my point for those statements relates to a thought that I had. For me, a shirt from GoodWill is not the best shirt I have. It is not the most expensive shirt I have bought for myself, nor anyone has given to me.
First, I once again thinking of how blessed I am. Some of the people I saw today-- GoodWill is where they go for their "good clothes." Second...My intent is to give the clothes I bought today away, after my trip is over... But would I be willing to give my "best shirt or skirt" away? I hope I would.. because I think I know that I should be willing...
May we never cling tightly to earthly things...this isn't our home... Putting it into perspective makes this issue simple:
"If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth." Colossians 3:1-2
the eternity perspective..
Place more value on eternity--your relationship with God's and other's...not your nicest clothes or belongings.
holding on to earth loosely,
Nikki
PS.... Today at GoodWill I got 2 skirts, 1 dress, and 2 tops... I might even wear them before Guatemala....I might even got there more with that friend I was talking about ;D
Is this thinking right? Technically, I will be giving someone "the shirt off my back?" I don't normally shop at GoodWill unless I am with one my best friends who does it (who might I mention is a pro at it and everytime I go w/ her I do find something really cool, usually not clothes though) or if I am in search for a ridiculous costume to wear for Halloween at Liberty... but other than that....You don't catch me there .
I'm not putting down GoodWill or those that shop there ( I will tell you about my awesome purchases later).. my point for those statements relates to a thought that I had. For me, a shirt from GoodWill is not the best shirt I have. It is not the most expensive shirt I have bought for myself, nor anyone has given to me.
First, I once again thinking of how blessed I am. Some of the people I saw today-- GoodWill is where they go for their "good clothes." Second...My intent is to give the clothes I bought today away, after my trip is over... But would I be willing to give my "best shirt or skirt" away? I hope I would.. because I think I know that I should be willing...
May we never cling tightly to earthly things...this isn't our home... Putting it into perspective makes this issue simple:
"If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth." Colossians 3:1-2
the eternity perspective..
Place more value on eternity--your relationship with God's and other's...not your nicest clothes or belongings.
holding on to earth loosely,
Nikki
PS.... Today at GoodWill I got 2 skirts, 1 dress, and 2 tops... I might even wear them before Guatemala....I might even got there more with that friend I was talking about ;D
Saturday, March 13, 2010
As I lay here in my warm bed, in my own room, which is actually owned by my parents, who just took me out to eat for a very nice meal, after I came home from college, college that they are supporting me through, a college where I have met incredible people who will now be (hopefully) life-long friends... and I can not go to sleep because I am worrying about my future? wow.. really
Talk about a lack of faith on my part. How many times has God taken care of this? Am I not reminded of the countless promises from God-- that He's got my back?
But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? --Matt. 6:30
Humble yourselves, therefore under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you. --1 Peter 5:7
just to name a couple...
But not only can I trust that God will take care of me--He already has! He has blessed me sooooooo much! He could have stopped just at salvation... but He continues to show me goodness and kindness I don't deserve.
And the grand finale on why this is such a lack of faith on my part....God has taught me more and more and more-- He is all I need. I may have thought that certain things would make me feel complete in life...but they didn't... nothing truly will but God. The times that I pursued these "things" that I thought I needed or that would satisfy me--these are the times that broke my heart. But God heals the brokenhearted.. and I am one of those brokenhearted he has fixed more than once. The biggest mystery in life to me... God's love.
With God, I got all I need--don't need to worry. Bring it on future.
"Satisfy me Lord, I'm begging you to help me see you are all I want you are all I need.... Satisfy me Lord." -Tenth Ave. North
Talk about a lack of faith on my part. How many times has God taken care of this? Am I not reminded of the countless promises from God-- that He's got my back?
But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? --Matt. 6:30
Humble yourselves, therefore under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you. --1 Peter 5:7
just to name a couple...
But not only can I trust that God will take care of me--He already has! He has blessed me sooooooo much! He could have stopped just at salvation... but He continues to show me goodness and kindness I don't deserve.
And the grand finale on why this is such a lack of faith on my part....God has taught me more and more and more-- He is all I need. I may have thought that certain things would make me feel complete in life...but they didn't... nothing truly will but God. The times that I pursued these "things" that I thought I needed or that would satisfy me--these are the times that broke my heart. But God heals the brokenhearted.. and I am one of those brokenhearted he has fixed more than once. The biggest mystery in life to me... God's love.
With God, I got all I need--don't need to worry. Bring it on future.
"Satisfy me Lord, I'm begging you to help me see you are all I want you are all I need.... Satisfy me Lord." -Tenth Ave. North
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